


Breaking Point

by Stephoki



Category: Supernatural, destiel - Fandom
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Autistic Castiel (Supernatural), Bees, Big Brother Gabriel, Bottom Castiel, Bottom Castiel/Top Dean Winchester, Brother Feels, Car Sex, Caring Dean, Castiel (Supernatural) and Bees, Castiel and Dean Winchester are Cute, Castiel's Nickname is Cas, Consensual Sex, Dean Winchester Cooks, Dean Winchester is a Good Cook, Dean is Bad at Feelings, Destiel - Freeform, Dominant Dean, Drunk Castiel, Drunk Dean, Drunk Sex, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Smut, Fingerfucking, First Dates, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Gardens & Gardening, Human Castiel, Human Gabriel, Impala, Insecure Castiel, Jealous Dean, Light Angst, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Mathematics, Mechanic Dean, Mechanic Dean Winchester, Mentioned Sam Winchester, Nicknames, Not Beta Read, Oral Sex, Pancakes, Pet Names, Porn, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Professor Castiel, Protective Dean Winchester, Sex, Sexual Content, Sexual Tension, Small Towns, Smut, Sub Castiel, Teacher Castiel, Top Dean, Top Dean Winchester, auto shop
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-18
Updated: 2017-09-21
Packaged: 2018-02-13 15:36:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 27,734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2155896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stephoki/pseuds/Stephoki
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel Novak is on a way to a business convention on the other side of the state. After stopping for lunch at a diner in a small town Castiel's car won't start and he's now dependent on an infuriatingly irresistible mechanic, Dean Winchester, that may push Cas past his breaking point.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Lunch Break

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to comment with advice and feedback.

It was business as usual for Castiel Novak to be on the road, traveling. His car, a 2006 Ford Focus he bought a few years back after graduating college, was practically his second home. The inside was littered with fast food wrappers, plastic bags, clothes strewn over the backseat from quick changes, and napkins crammed into random compartments for easy grabbing and wiping for any reason. It really did need to be cleaned out but at the moment he was too focused on getting across the state to a convention on the newest math principles and theories. 

As much as Castiel's social skills lacked, his mathematics were on par, so he was currently teaching at his local university. The very same University he had graduated from just four years ago. Frequently on breaks such as this month before he started planning summer term work he was on the road at conventions to learn new teaching methods or skills. This was his fourth one in the past month and probably his last before he needed to return to his small, unkempt apartment in his hometown. 

Cas tended to focus too much on work, neglecting supposed friends, family, belongings and frequently himself as well. He wouldn't shave for a month and would end up looking like a "caveman" or so his brother Gabriel told him on the few occasions they met up despite living not ten minutes from each other. He would forget meals and sleep and the such. Right now Cas was running on a few cups of coffee from a McDonald's run that morning. 

It wasn't until nearly lunch time that his car was showing signs of the red line the meter was currently pointed to. Only then did Cas decide that maybe it would be a good idea for him to stop and fuel up himself as well as the car. He pulled into a gas station that was next to a small diner with a few dingy cars parked out front and one shiny black one. He filled his own car's tank before parking it as close to the diner as possible and making his way into the little restaurant. 

The place smelled of grease and onions already and he seated himself in a booth near the window. Not one to forget work even for a lunch break, he had brought his laptop with him and as he sat down he opened it and powered it up, not even glancing at the menu. 

"What can I do ya for?" A waitress asked, barely pulling Castiel out of his computer daze. 

"A coffee would be appreciated," he said, trying to find a WIFI signal. 

"Is that all or are you going to get yourself something to eat?" she tapped her pen against her notepad and Cas looked up at her, almost equally annoyed even though he realized that she was just doing her job. The girl had sandy blonde hair, pulled up into a pony tail. She looked like she was in college still and she had on way too much red lipstick. Cas blatantly and slowly pulled up the menu flipping around before he ordered himself yet another cheeseburger, no onions. The girl wrote it down and started to walk away. "Do you have wireless internet?" Cas asked before she could escape. 

"Not here, hon," she shook her head and walked away, disappearing back into the kitchen. 

Cas cursed under his breath. Figures. A small town like this probably hadn't even heard of internet until the decade began. Instead he pulled up an excel spreadsheet he had been working on for a discussion he was going to be attending and typed away on that. 

He taught Combinatorial Topology. The Topology of Euclidean spaces, winding numbers and applications, fundamental groups covering spaces, simplicial complexes, the classification of two-dimensional manifolds, vector fields, the Poincare-Hopf theorem, and introduction to three-dimensional topology. He also taught a regular Topology class for graduates. It kept him busy.

When his coffee was placed in front of him he reached for it blindly, hissing as he burned his hand, grabbing the ceramic cup and not the handle. That prompted him to finally look over long enough to grab the handle and pull it over. His other hand continued to type as fast as he could which wasn't very despite how much practice he had at this. 

After he finished the excel document he started on a PowerPoint he was going to use for his Topology class and the new set of college students he'd be working with. That was about the same time his food was placed in front of him and he begrudgingly folded his laptop closed and slipped it back into his bag, sandwiching it between him and the wall. He mumbled some sort of thanks to the waitress before sliding the plate towards him and grabbing the ketchup, opening the burger and squeezing it out onto the bun, then taking a fry, dipping it in before closing the burger and rubbing it around to spread the ketchup evenly. 

Taking a bite, Castiel looked up and out the window. He was surprised to see that it had started raining. It had been beginning to get gray when he had come in but he hadn't heard anything or noticed the thunder or rain until this moment. He sighed, wishing he would have dug his umbrella out from underneath the trash piling up on the floor of the passenger seat. Maybe he shouldn't have even stopped for lunch and just waited until the next fast food drive through and gotten a different greasy burger to eat on the go. Just another wrapper to add to his growing collection.

Cas ate quickly, used to having to catch food between classes and office hours. He practically inhaled it. Honestly, he hadn't realized how hungry he was until he had popped that first french fry into his mouth. He suddenly wondered if he had even had dinner last night. He couldn't remember. Either way he was full now and he stood up, swinging his laptop bag over his shoulder and heading up to pay for the tab. 

It was still raining outside, if you could even call it just raining. More like pouring, coming down in sheets. But Cas needed to get back on the road even as the older lady at the register offered a free dessert if he stayed here until it cleared. He politely declined and headed out, getting drenched not a few steps from the door of the restaurant. Digging into his pocket he produced his keys and unlocked the car, slipping inside and closing the door behind him. 

His seats were used to soaking up rainwater by now and he really couldn't care less about being wet and cold. He'd turn on the heater in his car and put it on full blast once he got onto the main road. If he ever got onto the main road. No matter how many times he turned the key the car wouldn't start and after only the second try he was beginning to get frustrated. By the third he was completely pissed off and he let out a string of curse words worthy of a sailor as he popped the hood and got out, trying to look into the car through the rainwater dripping into his eyes. He couldn't see a damn thing though and he slammed the hood back down, locking his car and walking back into the restaurant. 

"Back so soon Darlin'?" the lady at the register asked. Cas completely ignored it, instead proclaiming, "I need the number of your local mechanic." 

"You're in luck, just you wait here one moment and I'll be right back for you," she smiled sweetly and stood up, walking back into the next aisle of tables. Cas didn't pay attention otherwise he may have questioned the lady's intentions. However he was too busy taking napkins out of a small dispenser and trying to dry his face and whatever else he could reach. Especially the front part of his hair that was dripping down into his eyes. He jumped, startled when the woman came back and said, "This here is our mechanic, Dean Winchester."


	2. Broken Down

"This is our mechanic, Dean Winchester"... or something like that. Cas didn't really pay attention to the words as he looked up at a tall man, a short crop of blonde hair and the most amazing green eyes he had the ever seen. Cas had never really been interested in women. Sure he had been at some point but after college he had suddenly found himself attracted more and more to men though women hadn't fallen completely off the radar. This man in particular turned Cas's mouth completely dry, something that had never happened to him before. 

"Hey, you're having car troubles?" this Dean asked, wiping his hands on a napkin. He had obviously been in the middle of his own meal and pulled away. 

Cas cleared his throat and nodded, licking his lips to try and get rid of their chapped feeling before saying, "My car won't start". 

"Show me the way," Dean's green eyes sparkled as he smiled over at Cas and he was suddenly, painfully self conscious. He was dripping wet, didn't know how undernourished and uncared for he looked at the moment and this man was sure to judge him for the amount of trash piled up in his car. Cas was therefore reluctant to show him his car but it seemed as if he had no other choice. 

"Fine," he nodded again, once, short and sweet. When Cas became self conscious he tended to get annoyed. Annoyed that someone had that much power over him and how little he paid attention to himself. If he didn't work so much then he'd probably look better than he did now, however that actually was. He couldn't remember checking his appearance this morning as he put on his suit, tie, and trench coat over top. For this he blamed his work and got annoyed at that as well. But at the same time he became annoyed at this Dean for distracting him from his work, if only for a minute. He needed his work to survive and get by. 

He pushed himself out the glass doors of the diner as the lady behind him yelled, "Don't catch a cold Dean. We need you back here." Cas heard Dean chuckle and a moment of silence before Dean said, "That's Ellen. It's her diner. Her daughter Jo works there. Pretty cute if you ask me but don't tell her I said that. She probably knows anyway, I've been trying to get her over to my place for a month." Of course he was interested in girls. Wasn't every decent looking guy? 

"This is my car." Cas then stepped back and pointed to his car. 

"Alright, can you go ahead and pop the hood for me?" Dean asked, his shirt soaked through and clinging to him in what looked like all the right places to Cas. He tore his gaze away, licking his lips again and nodding, going to open the car and do as Dean had requested. He stayed inside as he heard Dean messing around, looking at things. It was for the best that he was in here anyways, not looking at Dean, not getting distracted. While he waited he worried about how long this would take. He needed to be at the other side of the state by tomorrow at the latest. This was an important convention. One he simply couldn't miss. "So, I'm going to grab my car and see if I can't jump the battery. If not we have a more serious issue on our hands," Dean was suddenly at the window, yelling to be heard, and Cas bit his bottom, nodding as he tried to hide his surprise. 

In no time there was the shiny black car parked in front of him, both hoods popped as Dean hooked up the jumper cables. Cas continued to stay in the car and did exactly as Dean told him to do, trying to start the car multiple times to no avail. "Shit..." Cas mumbled and smacked the steering wheel. Now more concerned with what was going to happen Cas climbed out of the car and walked over in front of Dean who was dripping wet in the most attractive way possible. 

"What is the plan?" Cas asked, crossing his arms over his chest. 

"It looks like you have a bad ECU/MAF. It's your car's computer, technical side. It's going to be a while before I can get it fixed. I need to order parts and the such," Dean said, not even looking at him as he closed the hood of his own car which looked like an antique despite the pristine condition. Cas glanced back at his own car with the peeling paint job and dent in the fender from an accident a couple years ago. He cringed at the difference. 

"I need it fixed today," Castiel demanded and Dean turned to him with a frown. 

"Sorry man, no can do." 

"You don't understand. I have an actual job and I need to be somewhere tomorrow. I need my car," Cas stiffened, trying to stand up a little taller to seem more persistent. The aggravation of the car problem paired with the inaccessibility of this annoyingly handsome man had Cas on edge, already throwing around insults. 

Dean, who had been fairly friendly this whole entire time suddenly seemed annoyed himself. "Look, bud, I have to order parts. I have to have them shipped in here. It's not an overnight fix. And this job I have is the one that will get you your car back," he closed the hood of Cas's car with a huff. 

"And what exactly am I supposed to do until then?" Cas pressed his lips into a thin line. 

"Well right now you can come with me back to my shop so we can get the paperwork out of the way. Then you'll have to stay at the motel," Dean let out a loud exasperated sigh. 

" _The_ hotel?" Cas raised an eyebrow. 

"There's only one. I'll take you over to the auto shop in my car, then drop you off at the motel before I get the tow truck out here to pull yours back over so I can work on it," Dean explained. "Grab the stuff you want to bring with you." He said before climbing into his car and starting it, obviously going to sit there and wait for Cas who let out a frustrated scream through his teeth before taking a deep breath and going to get his suitcase and laptop bag, taking them back to Dean's car. He slid inside and went to toss the bags into the back but Dean glared at him and stopped him. "Don't ruin the seats. Damn it, here I'll put it back there," he rolled his eyes and took the large suitcase and laptop bag, climbing back out of the car and going over to gently slide them into the backseat. "Do you have no respect for cars?" he asked once he got back in. 

"They are a form of transportation. I respect them for that. They are for my convenience," Cas explained. "Not for pleasure or collecting." 

"Maybe not to you," he sighed and once again Cas smacked himself for offending Dean in this way. His nonexistent social skills were going to make sure Cas never found anyone who would be willing to be with him if he kept insulting them. Even if this particular man happened to be straight. Dean pulled the car out of the parking lot and Cas thought about how he could feel the car rumbling under the seat and in the car door, how he could hear the engine. How it was still raining outside and didn't look like it was going to be stopping any time soon. He looked at the lightning and thought about the thunder before it actually came. Anything besides the man sitting so close beside him and the fact that he wasn't going to make it to his convention.


	3. Coffee Break

The car kept rumbling along the rain pelted roads, the windshield wipers going at an agonizingly slow pace for the amount of water that was blocking their view. The ride itself was equally agonizing, the tension in the car thick enough to cut with a knife. A couple of streets over as the wind whipped across the car, the storm increasing in strength, Dean broke the silence. "What's your name? I don't think I caught it." He seemed to be back to his pleasant self though his grip on the steering wheel was tight as he stared straight ahead into the rain. 

"Castiel," Cas mumbled, glancing over at Dean and finally resting his wet head against the seat. Up until this point he had been awkwardly hunched over, bracing himself to crash at any time with Dean's too fast speed. 

"Castiel? That's interesting..." Dean commented. 

"Yeah, I guess."

"Don't you like it?" Dean asked him, taking his eyes off the road for a moment to slide them towards Cas. This caused Cas to grab the handle of the door, putting his nerves on edge. Honestly though, Cas hated his name. He partly blamed it for his lack of social ineptitude. If he had a normal name like James, or Zack, or something then he wouldn't have been teased so much, maybe would have made more than one friend through school, been able to develop with normal social interactions. He wasn't going to tell this to Dean though so instead he shrugged, basically killing the conversation, or so Cas thought. 

"Well I think it's pretty cool," Dean then said as they pulled into the parking lot of what Cas assumed was the auto shop though the rain was coming down so thick he couldn't tell for sure. The only thing he could make out was a sign on the side of the road that read, **Winchester & Sons**. 

"And sons?" Cas asked. Please don't tell him this man had kids too. That would just make his new found obsession with Dean that much worse. 

"This used to be my dad's shop," Dean explained. "My brother and I grew up here and worked with my dad. We were the sons." 

"Where are they now?" Cas asked as Dean parked the car and he noticed the way Dean stiffened slightly and cleared his throat, pretending to do something important he presumed. 

"Well, after my dad died, Sam went off to law school. Met a girl named Jess and moved in with her," he shrugged and Cas felt bad for asking. Something he didn't feel often. Cas might have even attempted to say something to him or apologize or something if Dean didn't get out of the car and close the door, forcing Cas to follow after him. 

Just as Cas slipped inside the reception area of the shop, once again dripping wet, the door slammed shut behind him, forced shut by the wind. Dean was already behind the front counter, flipping on lights and looking for the forms Cas would have to fill out. "Okay," he started, "basically just the type of car, how long you've had it, credit card information and all that. I have a pen around here somewhere," he mumbled, opening up a few drawers before producing a pen and handing it to Cas. 

Slipping the clipboard and paper off the counter, Cas grabbed the pen and headed over to one of the five hard plastic chairs set up on the other side of the small room, next to a buzzing vending machine. He scribbled silently, almost illegibly as Dean shuffled through papers behind the counter while he waited for Cas to finish up. Cas tried in vain to remember the license plate number and when he voiced his concern Dean told him not to worry about it. He'd fill it out for Cas when he picked up his car. 

Just as Cas was finishing up the paperwork a loud buzzing sound was emitted and Cas jumped, looking around. "Sorry about that, it's my weather radio. We get storms like this all the time," Dean explained going over to listen to it as an automated voice came over the frequency telling them there was a tornado warning. Cas, who was not used to this kind of thing, looked up at Dean, hoping he would tell them what to do. Dean noticed and shook his head as he turned the radio alert off and walked over to lean against the counter edge. "Don't worry about it. It's a county over. But it doesn't look like we'll be getting out of here any time soon," he pointed out the window. It looked like the most literal term of death Cas could think of at the moment, pitch black, not able to see the leaves on the bushes blowing just outside the window. 

"What do we do until it ceases?" Cas asked as he stood up and walked over to Dean, handing him back the clipboard, form, and pen. Dean shrugged. 

"I can try the TV but no promises it will work. The storms mess with the satellites you know?" Dean offered but Cas shook his head, sighing and going back to sit beside the vending machine. This time Dean joined him. "So what kind of thing do you need to be at?" 

"A math conference," Cas said and Dean scrunched up his face in this adorable way where there were little lines between his nose and eyebrows and his eyes crinkled at the edges. "It's actually very interesting." 

"Maybe for you. I was terrible at math. Practically the only time I could add two plus two was when it related to cars in some way," Dean shook his head, crossing his arms over his chest and sliding back in the chair. 

"I teach it at my local University," Cas then said and Dean nodded respectfully. 

"What kind? Algebra?"

"No, Topology," Cas corrected and Dean raised an eyebrow in confusion. 

"Top what?" Dean asked and Cas repeated the word. Dean shook his head again. "I don't even want to know," he chuckled before an uncomfortable silence fell around them.

Cas felt like tugging at his hair. This was agonizing. The silence, Dean sitting so close, not having anything to do. It had to have been months since he last didn't have anything to do. Or had free time whatsoever. He wasn't used to the easy laid back nature that Dean possessed, not a care in the world about the storm outside or any of that. Cas looked down, picking at some dirt under his fingernails. Despite neglecting himself Cas was never a dirty man. He showered and did all the basics to keep himself clean, so he never understood why there was also a black line under his fingernails no matter how many times he scrubbed them. 

"Do you want some coffee?" Dean asked, once again breaking the silence. That was obviously turning into his job. Breaking the awkward silences and initiating conversation. This was probably a good thing considering Cas wasn't quite sure how to go about starting a conversation. 

"Coffee?" Cas asked, looking up. It was tempting despite the fact that this would be his fourth cup today. 

"Yeah, I have a pot in the back. Just in case you know. So what do you say? It's still hot from this morning," Dean smiled, knowing he already had Cas hooked. "I'll go make us a couple cups." Then Dean disappeared into the back of his shop and Cas sat there alone trying to decide what part he could play to make this less awkward than it already was. He picked up a car magazine discarded on a small wooden table before tossing it back down and picking up a National Geographic. That was more his style. It was an old edition from a few years back but the information was interesting all the same so he thumbed through it. That's when all the lights went out, a loud crash of thunder rolling overhead, so loud that Cas thought for sure it was a tornado. The vending machine stopped humming, the thunder still rolling across the skies and Cas quickly dropped the magazine, hurrying into the back room and standing in the doorway, feeling like an idiot as the thunder stopped. Dean noticed him and tried to not chuckle, not that Cas could see the way his mouth turned up at the corners. "Just thunder..." he said. 

"I was aware of that!" Cas snapped, once again crossing his arms over his chest. "I had thought you might need some assistance carrying the cups back out. I seem to have been mistaken," he huffed. 

Dean chuckled audibly this time. "It's fine. It creeps me out too some times. You want to grab us a couple flashlights? They're under the sink over here," he said and only then did Cas noticed that he had entered an area that was probably a break room or something. After a moment of embarrassing silence Cas nodded and knelt down beside Dean's legs. His jeans brushed over Cas's shoulder and Cas shivered, not understanding how he could be so affected by this man. He pulled out a couple flashlights, turning one on so he could get a better look around. 

"How many people work for you?" Cas asked as he shined the light over cabinets and a microwave and the coffee maker that only had a small amount of black coffee sitting in the bottom now. 

"No one. It's just me now. People kept leaving. I guess small towns aren't people's little slice of heaven anymore. I live here now. My house area is in the back," Dean nodded down a hall across from the door. 

"Oh..." 

"Yeah. But I get to keep all the money. Not many cars break down here anyways. Maybe one every few months." 

"Then how do you make money? Living wage? I can barely afford my own apartment on my teacher's salary," Cas asked, confused as to how he could afford to keep the electricity bill going. 

"When I'm not working here I'm also kind of the fixer of all other things around here. The town maintenance man I guess. Plumbing, electric, heating and cooling, swing sets. I do it all. You know, why don't we just drink these in here," Dean said and placed the coffee mugs down at the small table, pulling out a small fold up chair from underneath it and sitting himself down. He kicked its twin out from under the table for Cas who took the seat, placing the flashlights down, one pointed up at the ceiling as if it were some form of light. 

For the next hour or so Dean and Cas sat in the room making small talk. The lights flickered back to life about halfway through and Cas turned the flashlight off. They finished their drinks long before the rain stopped but were still messing with the cups, twisting them in their hands. They talked about cars, or Dean did. He really did most of the talking. And he talked about his brother Sam. Cas barely got a word in, not that he minded. 

Eventually Dean looked behind himself and peeked through the blinds. "Looks like the coffee break is over. The rain's slowed down and I should probably get you to the motel. You probably have important stuff you have to work on. Math stuff," he stood and placed his mug in the sink. Cas followed suit silently, walking back out into the rain with Dean just a minute later, heading back for the black impala.


	4. Breaking His Balls

Dean dropped Cas off at the motel soon after they left the auto shop. The rain had dwindled down to barely a drizzle and he could see the streets at least as they drove. Unfortunately he could see the hotel too and suddenly he didn't want to get out of the car. The place didn't even look that bad, the thing was Cas had never felt this attracted to anyone before and he _really_ didn't want to leave because that probably meant the only other time that he'd see Dean was when he went to pick up his car. 

Of course that whole thought process was jumbled and completely useless, but no matter how many times Cas reminded himself that Dean was straight he still got this flutter in his stomach when he looked at him. This was going to take some time. The time that Cas honestly didn't want to allow it. 

"Thank you for the ride," Cas said, not moving to get out until Dean cleared his throat. Then Cas opened the door and stepped out. "Oh, and my car..." he added on before grabbing his bags out of the backseat. 

"It's my job. Literally. Hope you have a nice stay," Dean offered. _It would be nicer if you stayed with me_. Cas didn't know where that thought came from and it caught him off guard, making his face redden a bit and he mumbled something about it being hot outside even though the rain had actually cooled it off. He then closed the car door and turned around, quickly hurrying inside the motel. 

The lady who checked him in was nice enough though her daughter seemed a little off the walls, probably from boredom, the poor child. Cas wondered how many children were in this town. This girl was the first one he'd seen. He brushed the thought off though as he now trudged through the halls of the motel, looking for the number that matched the one on his key card. 

For some reason after all of this he was really tired. Of course that could be his typical lack of sleep and without something to distract him from himself for the moment he could focus on how crappy he really felt. He was overworked and exhausted, or as Gabriel had frequently referred to it as him having broken his balls. 

Once he found his room he tossed his suitcase down, laying the laptop case on the ground beside the bed, and went to open it and find a fresh change of clothes. Maybe his pajamas that he always packed but very rarely ever used. Most often he'd find himself waking up at a table, a puddle of drool next to him and his computer in front of him having fallen asleep as well. 

Cas got into his pajamas right away, not bothering with anything else for the moment except for climbing into the bed and flipping on the television, turning it to his usual news. It wasn't until he was nearly passed out from exhaustion that he thought he might as well call and cancel his reservations at the hotel for the convention and hope he could get his money back this late. He sighed, work never done it seemed, and got his cell phone out of the pocket of his trench coat that was hanging on the back of a small wooden chair placed in front of a desk. Then he went to grab his laptop and pull up the information for the room he reserved. If he didn't have that there was no way he'd ever get any of that money back. Money he'd need to pay for his rent next month. 

The call took longer than Cas expected and he was placed on hold several times. However, the important part was that he managed to get his money sent back into his bank account. He might have to use it for this unexpected delay and now his car which didn't seem like a cheap fix. He might need some for his sanity too if he couldn't get Dean off of his mind. 

Eventually he managed to get back into bed, the computer closed on the desk, his phone on the nightstand and the news droning on in the background. He rested back against the pillows, pulling the covers up to keep him from the cold. And that's how he fell asleep and got the first good night's rest in months.


	5. Breaking the Bank

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I haven't updated in a few days. I had a night class yesterday! Hopefully this chapter is better than the last!

The morning didn't come with the pleasant feeling that the night and going to sleep had brought Cas. He woke up in a tangle of sheets, sweat beading his body. Either the air conditioning in his room was out or it was so hot outside it was seeping inside and wrapping its claws around Cas, trying to drag him into the depths of hell. He groaned and sat up, kicking the sheets the rest of the way off and glancing at the alarm clock on the nightstand which happily told him it was ten in the morning. Not used to sleeping in so late he almost panicked with the feeling that he needed to be somewhere. Of course there was no where to be on this day, at least not that he could get to, so he looked around himself anxiously. 

How exactly was he supposed to entertain himself the rest of the day? The hotel room was too hot to stay in at the moment, he had no car, and it seemed there was nothing in this town except the run down cinema he passed on the way in. He briefly thought about maybe just working on some more of the power point he started before brushing the idea off because maybe he'd just use one of the old ones. After all it's not like they had any new or different material to cover. And for once in his life he couldn't find it in himself to do his work. It seemed like last night's exhaustion had made him despise ever working that hard again though he knew once he returned to the comfort of his apartment and went back to work he'd get back into the swing of things. 

Shaking his head to get rid of the unwanted thought he rolled over so his back could feel the little bit of air that was seeping in, probably from the hallway. He soon found himself too uncomfortable to fall back asleep though so he stood, stretching out and doing the next best thing to switching sides to get cool, he hopped in the shower. He kept the water on cool but not too cold and he reveled in it, taking his time as he washed himself. He was pretty sure he hadn't had a decent one of these in a while, at least not like this. Not where he had the time to rub the shampoo through his hair and stay in until his fingers got pruny. Once he had decided he was clean enough he stepped out, drying off with one of the towels hanging along the rack across from the toilet. It was soft and surprisingly plush for a hotel in the middle of nowhere. He wrapped it around his waist as he walked out into the still too hot room. 

His suitcase had been tossed down by the desk and now he picked it up, unzipping it and rifling through the clothes he had brought. All were business suits except the clothes he came in which were in no shape to be worn again today. So he did the only thing he could do and put on one of the suits, tying the blue tie to complete it. After all, he couldn't wear just the suit. It would look wrong. 

Then he decided that he should go out. Maybe look for a change of clothes while he was out so he wouldn't be stuck in business suits for the next few days or however long it took for him to get his car back. He definitely couldn't stay in the room though, especially in the suit because he'd be friend in just under an hour. After running by the mirror on the way to the door Cas decided to ditch the suit jacket and picked up his trench coat instead, deciding it helped make it look a little more casual. 

As he left he stopped by the front desk to inform the lady that the air conditioning was broken in his room. She nodded and assured him that she'd get it taken care of. 

The hotel was the beginning of a street lined with shops and small restaurants. He supposed maybe his first inspection of the town as little was a little off. It seemed to have plenty of business. He made his way down the sidewalk under the awnings set up in front of the different stores. Other people walked past him or behind him and after a little while he slipped into a coffee shop. It was nice and cold inside and Cas breathed a sigh of relief before glancing up at the small menu. He settled on a small coffee and a breakfast sandwich. 

This was going to be the start of something new, he decided once he had picked up his food and taken a seat by the window. He told himself that he'd stop skipping meals and not sleeping at night to take care of work. He'd shave and make sure his clothes matched in the morning when he picked them out which frequently failed to happen. That or he'd put his tie on backwards as he hurried out the door. Then he sighed because how long would that really last? Apparently until a half an hour later nearing noon when his phone rang in his pocket. He took it out and looked at the caller ID, suddenly worried. It was his boss. 

"Hello?" he answered after swallowing the last bite of his breakfast sandwich that he'd taken the time to savor. 

"What happened to you? The convention center called us. You never made it. That's not like you Castiel. You know this meeting is important."

"I apologize. My car broke down on my way. I should have called to inform you," Cas frowned, his pleasant temperament wiped out and replaced with a serious demeanor. 

"This is money from the University Castiel. We took it to fund this trip. If we would have known about the situation we could have sent someone else in your place," the boss sounded mad. Usually Castiel was one of his favorite employees, and Cas did know that it was a lot of money to pay for the trip. He just hadn't thought about it after everything that had happened yesterday. 

"I apologize-"

"We're breaking the bank here. We need our employees to keep their commitments and realize that their priority when on business time _is_ business. Do you understand?" 

Cas nodded even though his boss couldn't see him before clearing his throat and giving a short, "Yes I understand." He hated being reprimanded, making mistakes...

"Good. Then I bet you know you're going to have to do something to make up for this. We're sending one of your colleagues today, however she was working on a report for the board of educators meeting this coming Wednesday. I've already sent you the file. You'll need to finish the report or you're done Castiel. We excuse your eccentric behavior and dress code because you're a good professor and mathematician. However if you waste us money we'll have to let you go. We need the report sent back here Wednesday morning. Do I make myself clear Castiel?" 

"Yes sir. I understand," Cas closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose before his boss hung up and he dropped his phone into his lap and taking a deep breath. When he looked back up he grabbed his coffee, downing the rest of it and going up, ordering another one to go because it was going to be a long day ahead of him. Back to work already.

He took the short walk back to his hotel in long strides. He didn't know how long this report was supposed to be but chances were it was long. And knowing the person they were probably sending out, Naomi, it wouldn't even be close to done yet considering she always waited until the last minute. That's how she always said she worked best, under pressure. 

Cas was already running his fingers through his hair, tugging at the ends and making them stand on end. He entered the hotel from a side entrance that was closer to his room and when he got there he froze. The door was ajar and there were noises inside. Had someone broken in? He had his laptop in there. Oh God, he'd get fired for sure. No one would believe him. He got stuck in this tiny town off to the side of some road, his car broke down then his hotel room got broken in to. 

He lifted his coffee cup threateningly and pushed the door open. Someone was kneeling down on the floor near the desk, right where his laptop bag was. "Hey! Get away! Before I call the cops!" he yelled, barely inching inside the room. 

He was shocked when the guy hopped up and turned around, holding out his hands. He was grinning and Cas felt like a complete idiot. "What are you going to do? Burn me to death?" 

"Sorry, I... didn't realize... what are you doing in my room?" Cas lowered his coffee and looked at it, face flushing a dark red. Dean lowered his arms too and raised a tool that Cas didn't recognize. 

"Fixing your air conditioner. Broken remember?" 

"Sorry," Cas said again, this time reaching over and placing his coffee on the night stand. He plopped down on the edge of the bed and ran his fingers through his hair again, pressing the heel of his hands into his eyes. 

"What's wrong?" Dean asked, his voice laced with actual concern which Cas was surprised to hear. The comments people made in passing to him, "concerned" about him were merely there, nothing actually showing any kind of concern for Cas's well being. 

"Nothing," Cas lied and shook his head, dropping his hands back to his lap after rubbing one down his face. 

"Come on, tell me," Dean pulled the chair out from the desk and spun it around, straddling it as he sat down and resting his arms on the back. "I'm a really good listener," he gave Cas a lopsided smile that made Cas's heart skip a beat for some reason that he couldn't quite wrap his mind around. 

"My boss called to reprimand me this morning. He assigned me a report that a colleague of mine was to be doing. However they're sending her on my trip to the convention and forcing me to do the report. If I don't get it done by Wednesday morning I will be... let go," Cas took a deep breath and let it out loudly. 

"Man... that's harsh," Dean shook his head. Cas wasn't even about to talk about how his boss had called him eccentric. It felt like he was back in primary school, except with more educated insults. "I'm sorry. Maybe I should have offered to drive you up there myself." 

"No, it wasn't your place to drive me. I should have called my boss to tell him that I wouldn't be able to make it." 

"Well what is this report on?" Dean asked him, focusing more than any person had on him before, even his students. 

"I don't know yet. I have to look at the file, it's on my computer," Cas nodded towards the computer case next to the desk. 

"Then I guess I'll let you work. Just don't overwork yourself. You look much better than you did yesterday by the way," Dean commented as he stood back up and this time he handed the computer case to Cas. 

"No promises," Cas mumbled in his breath. He powered up the computer and sighed, chewing his bottom lip. 

"I'm serious. That car has to have someone to go back to. It would miss you," Dean joked. 

"I doubt that. Now I really need to work. Thank you for fixing the air conditioning." 

"It's my job. Don't make me come check on you tonight, because I will," Dean packed up and walked to the door. "Good luck," then the door shut and the only sounds in the room were the sounds of Cas typing and the air conditioning kicking on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading my story. If you like this then check out my vocal article on the magic of fanfiction! https://geeks.media/the-magic-of-fan-fiction?_ga=2.111970820.142276998.1506912793-416789174.1506912793


	6. Breaking Out

The report file hadn't even been started on yet, aside from the instructions there weren't even any words on the page. Cas sighed deeply and began working, looking up enough information to fill the hour time slot this particular report was going to take. Turns out it was actually the focus of the whole meeting which meant a lot of crap rested on his shoulders right now. 

He typed, and typed, the only small breaks were when he went to read back over what he had already worked on and took a sip of his now cold coffee. He typed until his fingers felt numb and he kept making stupid typing errors almost every word. He worked and squinted at the computer until the words on the screen started blurring together or fading out and he would have to take the time to pause and reread them three or four times. He completely disregarded time and himself, back to work as usual, too busy to focus on anything else. 

He sat on the bed, going through internet tab after internet tab, link after link, to find the information he needed. He tried to figure out ways to configure it on the page so it sounded right. Not _eccentric_ or something like that. He swallowed thickly, throat dry and sore as he continued to work well into the day. He wasn't paying attention to how long he had spent working on this, so into the moment that he barely noticed anything else anymore. That's why when there was a loud, sharp, knock at the door Cas just about jumped a foot into the air. 

He sat there for a moment. It was dark outside and he wondered when that had happened. Then there was another loud knock and Cas scrambled out of the bed and over to the door, opening it. Who was there but one Dean Winchester. 

"I thought I told you I had to work," Cas grumbled out, but he opened the door wider and walked back to his bed, allowing Dean to follow him into his room. 

"And I thought I told you to take care of yourself. Looks like neither of us are very good listeners," Dean looked around the room. "Have you seriously not moved since I left?" 

"I suppose I haven't." 

"That's not good Cas. You have a few days, you don't need to work yourself to death. Come on, I'm going to break you out of here. We'll go do something," Dean leaned against the wall and Cas sat back down in front of his computer. 

"I need to get this finished. My job depends on it, Dean," Cas frowned and stared at the computer screen, trying to remember where he'd left off. He started typing again and Dean sighed, going to sit down on the bed as well. Cas didn't notice until Dean leaned forward and closed the computer, pulling it away from Cas. 

"And you'll get it done. It will be here when we get back, I promise. An hour or so won't hurt it." 

Cas gaped at him, reaching for the computer but Dean pulled it out of reach. "You'll get it back at the end of the night. Maybe. You won't sleep if I do that so I'll just have to keep it from you until morning. That shouldn't be too bad. Now come on." Dean tucked the computer under his arm and stood up. "You're coming with me." He figured taking the computer with him would be a good idea to get Cas to move, and it worked too. Once Cas was out the door Dean slid the computer back inside the room and pushed Cas towards the car. 

"What exactly are we supposed to be doing that's fun?" Cas asked, glaring at Dean for pulling him away from his work. 

"I'm taking you to a bar," Dean shrugged, unlocking the car once they got outside and slipping into the driver's seat. Cas paused, frown deepening before he sat down in the passenger seat. "You have been to a bar right?" 

"Of course I have been to a bar, Dean. I'm not uncultured. I just don't... I don't fit in there," Cas crossed his arms over his chest, refusing to look over at Dean. 

"Everyone's drunk practically. You'll fit in just fine. They won't even know the difference," Dean assured him as he backed out of the parking space. Cas huffed and puffed a little on the way there but Dean remained cheery and smiling over at him which kind of made his stomach flip every time he caught it.

"Would you change your mind if I told you I don't drink?" Cas asked after a couple minutes. Dean raised an eyebrow and asked, "Why? Religious reasons or just like sobriety?" 

"The latter."

"Then no, it doesn't. Trust me. I won't drink tonight. I'll watch you and make sure you don't get yourself into any trouble. You really need to relax. Just one night okay? Then I'll take you back to your hotel and you can work away tomorrow. So long as you promise me you'll eat and I won't have to come over at regular intervals to make sure you have food, water, and potty breaks. Sound good?" 

Cas grumbled something under his breath that Dean took as acceptance. He pulled out front of a bar with a flashing neon sign after another few minutes and he got out, urging Cas out as well. Cas didn't like the look of it, or the area. Don't even get him started on the people outside of the bar. Dean pushed him inside though and tugged on his coat sleeve up to the bar, sliding onto a stool. Cas reluctantly slid onto the stool next to him. Dean ordered him a drink, some kind of beer, and pushed it over to him when the bartender, a lady who winked at Dean, slapped the beer down on the counter. "Drink up, Cas." 

Cas looked at it for a moment before taking a reluctant sip of the drink. It wasn't that bad, but he continued to awkwardly sit in the chair, back ramrod straight. Dean tried to tell him to relax but he wouldn't listen, only taking in small amounts of alcohol at each sip. There were other people at the bar but there were also people lined up behind them on the "dance floor" which was really just where a bunch of the chairs and tables had been pushed to the side and they were blasting some music over radio speakers. He felt out of place and uncomfortable. 

"Cas, it's really not that bad of a place. Just chug one down and you'll feel a lot better," Dean said and Cas turned to look at him. 

"Drinking isn't the answer Dean," Cas said before looking down at the bottle in his hands. 

"You're right, it isn't. But for one night, it will make you relax and have a good time whether you remember it or not. It will give you a break from the stress until you figure out how to deal with it. I should know," Dean sighed and Cas wondered what he meant but didn't say anything about it. Cas took a couple more sips. After Cas had finished about half the bottle Dean ordered them a plate of Nachos to share. It would be Cas's first meal since breakfast that day and Dean seemed to know that, giving him most of the cheesy chips and only snagging a few for himself. 

After that Cas started to loosen up a bit, whether it was from the now satisfied stomach, the bottle of beer he'd managed to finish in between cheese and salt, or just because of Dean, Cas wasn't sure. Either way when Dean ordered him a second beer he didn't refuse and he took a chug right after he got it open. Dean smiled over at him and Cas smiled back. 

Sometime in between that and when they left that night Dean managed to get Cas over to the dance floor. He stumbled in a drunken haze, still holding a bottle in one hand and drinking from it. He wasn't even sure if he was dancing but he felt like he was moving that was for sure. Or maybe it was the room. The room was moving around him. That would make more sense. Wait, no it wouldn't. 

Cas had never been drunk once in his life and he was confused but at the same time couldn't care less. He danced, no matter what he looked like though it was probably stupid. At one point there were a couple girls grinding against him. Cas wasn't sure where Dean had gone to. He looked around but didn't see him but was soon distracted by the girls again, one on each side. One had grabbed his tie and was pulling him closer, the other was rubbing her ass against Cas's in the most sexual way he thought possible. Cas just laughed happily. He was having fun. Something he never really remembered doing before. However after tonight, he thought, he'd remind himself to do more of it often. 

Through the night Cas went back for two more beers. He wasn't sure where Dean was, though some times he thought he heard him and he swung around to see if he could find him but he couldn't remember if he was actually there or not once he turned around. Instead of worrying about it he kept dancing and talking to random strangers he'd never known before. Most of them laughed and drunkenly cheered him on. He liked the attention. 

Sometime close to midnight there was an arm wrapped around his waist leading him outside. Cas pouted and mumbled something about wanting to stay but the voice told him no, he had to leave with him and Cas continued to pout as he was loaded into a car and buckled in. He was out like a light before the car even reached its destination.


	7. Breaking Skin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before you read this notice the chapter name. There will be unintentional cutting/bleeding in this chapter, as well as an emotional breakdown. Just a warning for anyone who may need it.

Cas woke up the next morning in his bed at the hotel, with a strange and very painful headache. He didn't remember much of the night before, just Dean taking him to the bar. Speaking of Dean he was nowhere to be found which left Cas slightly disappointed. He squinted, glared really, at the window where light was shining through, splitting and fracturing inside Cas's skull. He flipped himself over and buried himself into the covers, forcing his face into his pillow. Maybe he could just sleep this thing off. 

The only thing Cas didn't know was that the more he tried to lay there the more sounds he could hear from other rooms in the hotel or people in the halls and the cars on the street and each little sound sent Cas's head pounding. He grumpily stood up and went to go close the blinds as best as he could while he avoided looking at them. What the hell had Dean done to him last night? As if in answer Cas found a note written on his nightstand and he picked it up, squinting and ignoring his head just long enough to read it. 

_"Cas man, you sure went on a bender tonight. I think you had fun. Heads up, take some aspirin and I left a can of coke and one of ginger ale in the mini fridge. Drink one after you take the aspirin. It will help, trust me. Secret of mine. I'll be stopping by around dinner, I'll bring you something. Something really greasy, that will help too. Don't work yourself to death. Try to eat before I get there. Give me a call if you need me, -Dean"_

He'd even left his phone number at the bottom of the paper. Cas put the note back down an went to rifle through his things until he found an aspirin bottle. He was used to keeping one on him at practically all times. He took it with a cup of water from the tap before he opened the fridge and took out the can of ginger ale, saving the coke for later. The popping of the can as it opened made Cas cringe but he took a sip, and then another as he went to go sit back in bed. Slowly it all started to kick in and Cas thought back to where he had been last night. Working.

He leaned over to find his computer but it wasn't there. He looked around a little bit until he found it by the door where Dean had no doubt left it after tricking Cas outside into the real world. He picked it up and brought it back to bed to continue work. 

If he was relaxed last night, today it all screwed him over. He didn't even want to do this any more. He kept thinking about his boss called him eccentric, how this was his last chance before he got fired. How much work he had to do and he couldn't find the information he needed and it was driving him up a wall. None of this was making sense anymore. It was all just blurring together and the whole thing sounded terrible and there was no way he was going to be able to get this done by Wednesday.

Around five Cas couldn't take it any more. He completely broke down into a blubbering mess. He slid the computer off his lap, going to grab one of the wine bottles from the mini fridge because apparently it had worked yesterday. Only Cas's hands were shaking too bad this time and he dropped the bottle, watching helplessly as it shattered all over the ground. This only made Cas cry harder. He bent down, trying to clean up the spilled drink and getting all the glass shards together. Through the tears he couldn't see as well as he should have been able to though and he yelped, as a sharp pain slid across the palm of his hand and then there was stinging, so bad it felt like his whole hand was on fire. Cas stumbled up, he didn't know what was going on. His head was pounding mercilessly and he just couldn't deal with this too. So he did the only thing he could think of, calling Dean. 

Dean answered his phone on the third ring and said, "Hello, this is Dean Winchester who is this?" 

"D-Dean?" Cas blubbered, completely embarrassed with himself but also in no place to hang up. "It's me... Cas- Castiel." 

"Cas? Cas, what's wrong? What's going on?" Dean asked him. 

"I don't... my hand... and I just, please can you come?" Cas asked, feeling like an idiot as he gripped the phone tightly with his good hand. Through his tears he could see the red spreading over his injured one and he cried even harder. He was being ridiculous. 

"Okay, okay Cas I'll be over soon. I was just getting us an early dinner. I'll be right there. Don't go anywhere. Just stay calm okay?" Cas could hear the sounds behind Dean, the sound of a bell on a door, the sound of his car. 

"Okay..." Cas nodded on his end even though Dean couldn't see him. Then he hung up and sat on the edge of the bed, gripping the wrist of his injured hand tightly, trying to stop the pain. 

Dean practically busted down the door about ten minutes later. Cas wasn't sure where he had gotten a key but he couldn't mind. Dean tossed the food down on the desk, observing the broken wine bottle and the blood that was pooling in Cas's palm, dripping through his fingers. 

"Hey Cas, it's okay. I'm right here. It's just a little cut," Dean sat down beside him and rubbed a hand over his back. "Come on, let me clean you up and you can tell me what happened," he offered, wrapping an arm around Cas's waist and pulling him up, helping him carefully avoid the glass and wine and pulling him towards the bathroom. "Just sit down," he led him towards the closed toilet and sat him down. He gently took Cas's hand and held it up over the sink before behind down under it to look for the first aid kit. 

"Just- just everything. I can't do this shit anymore. My boss thinks I'm eccentric, this is my last chance to keep my job and it's too much work. I can't find the information. I'm not going to be able to finish this. I don't know what to do," Cas shook his head and hissed as Dean poured peroxide over his cut. It made sense what was hurting now after he felt this. It must have been the wine that got into his cut. 

"You aren't eccentric. And they'll be idiots to fire you. You work so hard..." Dean said to him as he rinsed the blood off of Cas's hand under the cold water. 

"Apparently not hard enough. I can't do this. I just can't. It's too much. I don't know what I'm going to do. I need this job..." Cas tried to stop crying and stop embarrassing himself. 

"Yes you can. But maybe you should find a different job. Find someplace that will appreciate you."

"Like where? I have horrific social skills if you haven't already noticed. No one will want to hire me. I'm a teacher..." 

Dean shook his head softly and started wrapping up Cas's hand with clean gauze. "I don't know. But it sounds to me like you need another drink. Let's calm down, eat dinner and then we can go back to the bar. I think we're both going to need one tonight." Dean tossed away the dirty toilet paper and towel he had used to dab Cas's hand dry. 

"Okay," Cas nodded because that did sound good. "We can do that." He stood up, rubbing roughly at his eyes to rid them of tears because that was probably something he'd never live down. "What did you get us to eat? You know you didn't have to..." 

"I know but I was worried you wouldn't eat if I didn't. And was I right? What have you had today?" Dean asked, shutting off the light and walking back out to the bed. 

"Ginger ale..." Cas frowned and ducked his head down preparing to be reprimanded as he sat at the head of the bed.

"See? Well that's why I'm here. I got us Sonny's. It's on the edge of town but ribs and stuff. I didn't know what you wanted so I got you some of those and different sauces. With like macaroni and cheese and mashed potatoes I think. I know two starches but I figure you can risk it considering you never eat," Dean chuckled and he sat down near the foot of the bed. He was distributing out the food and handed him his. 

"Thank you," Cas looked up at him and took the food. "It must have been expensive. I should pay you back... and the drinks last night... I'm assuming you paid. I don't remember anything." 

"Yeah, I paid. Don't worry about it though. You need your money." 

"And what about tonight?" 

"I got that too. It's fine, really. Just eat your damn food so we can get to the bar huh?" Dean chuckled and smiled up at him. Cas eased back onto the pillows and smiled too.


	8. If You Break

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I've had a really rough time with this chapter. I spent over an hour working on it, and suddenly it just... poof! And I've been sitting here crying trying to fix it because I don't remember all of what I wrote. And... I'm just really sorry if it's not that good. I'll make the next one better I promise.

Dean dragged Cas out of the motel after they had finished eating. Actually, dragged isn't the right word. This time Castiel came willingly and followed Dean out to the car. It was still daylight out though neither of them seemed troubled by going to get drunk while the sun was still up. It wasn't really Dean's thing normally though, waiting until the party started at night to down his own beers, however today the presence of the sun hardly seemed to matter. 

Dean parked the Impala at his auto shop which was only down the street from the now recognizable neon sign. He explained that if they were both drinking he'd rather not have to worry about driving. That of course would be dangerous and illegal, even the short distance down the street. So they walked down the sidewalk towards the bar, Dean pushing the door open for Cas once they had arrived. Cas pulled his trench coat tighter around himself and sat down at the same bar stool he had occupied only last night. Had it really only been last night? It seemed so long ago. Dean sat down beside him and Cas took the few moments to look around. 

During the day the bar didn't seem as crazy as last night. This should make Cas more comfortable. In fact the place was almost deserted save for a few people in some back booths munching on cheeseburgers and nachos, only two of the items served there. However, Cas still felt just as nervous as last night. With less people here eyes were sure to fall on him. 

Dean ordered them both a beer and some chips with salsa. Not nachos, Dean explained to Cas who questioned why he had specifically ordered that. When they came they started their small talk, starting with work as they both munched on the chips despite how full they were from their barbeque they had only just devoured. "I still say you find a job somewhere else. I'm sure you could find something around here," Dean suggested, his implications none too hidden though Cas didn't seem to catch on. He merely shrugged, not really wanting to explain why that didn't sound like a good idea to him. "Just a suggestion," Dean commented and took a sip of his beer. 

Cas took a sip of his beer as well. Until the previous night Cas hadn't had a beer in his life. He had though enjoyed wine on a few occasions, but not beer. It was bitter still but this particular brand seem to have an almost chocolate taste to it as well. He wondered if all beer tasted like this or if there was something special about this particular bottle. He didn't ask though and continued with the chatting, sipping at his beer in between words.

As the night progressed so did their conversation, leading to more personal topics. They had already cleared their plate of chips and were on their second beer, perhaps helping ease the conversation along. They made it a ritual as they continued talking that once they mentioned something that struck a chord with one of them, after getting it off their chest they would both sip a beer as if to make the alcohol banish it for the night at least. 

"What happened to your father?" Cas asked after a moment of silence. "I know you told me he... passed... but..." 

"Heart attack," Dean looked down at his bottle of beer and Cas happily took in the view of Dean's profile, his nose and perfect lips, not to mention his jaw, line with stubble and Cas couldn't help but feel the need to press his lips to the corner where it met just under his ear. "Or at least that's what they told us."

"I'm sorry for your loss," Cas said and they both tipped their bottles back and sipped at their beer, Cas following Dean's lead. "My father left us. A year before I graduated high school." 

"That's a douche move," Dean looked over at him, placing the bottom of the beer bottle firmly back on the bar. "You don't leave your kids." 

"He blamed me for my mother's death. He always told me it was my fault. He said that's why he was leaving too. He couldn't stand to look at me anymore..." Cas felt his chest tighten at the thought. 

"Well you know what?" Dean's words broke through the moment of pain Cas was feeling and he looked up expectantly. "Well fuck him. It's not your fault Cas. Don't let yourself believe that shit okay?" Cas nodded and Dean's green eyes held his gaze until they were sure Cas was telling the truth. 

They took another sip. 

"My mom died too. When I was seven. There was a fire. I only remember the heat, and Dad was yelling at me to grab Sammy and get out. So I did. I took my little brother and I ran." 

"It seems we both have suffered losses," Cas commented and Dean nodded, lifting the bottle to his lips once more. Cas nearly chugged his portion.

There was another moment of silence before Dean placed his bottle back on the table, taking his hand off of it and turning towards Cas. "So our lives can't just suck. What do you do for fun?" he asked. "Nevermind," he added jokingly, "I don't think I'd be able to handle if you told me differential algebraic equations." 

Cas tilted his head to the side not getting the joke and shook his head. "I would never do those for fun. They aren't fun Dean. I watch television." 

"It was a joke Cas. And yeah? What kind of shows? Anything in particular?" 

The beer must have been starting to work on Cas at the moment, loosening his lips a little because before he realized it he had answered with, "The Pizza Man." Dean raised an eyebrow at that and silently mouthed the words to himself. Cas's face burned bright red and he shook his head furiously this time. "Never mind, forget I said anything." 

"Come on, it can't be that bad... I mean unless it's... no, Cas it's not is it? Porn?" He looked at Cas who suddenly felt angry for the way Dean started laughing. 

"I said forget it." 

"It's not that big of a deal Cas. Everyone watches it. I just figured you'd be spending more time with the math chicks at your University than watching it on television." 

"No, I do not have 'chicks'. At all..." Cas mumbled and Dean frowned. 

He then asked Cas, "What do you mean you're a-"

"No!" Cas snapped before glaring down at his nearly empty beer bottle and downing the rest of it. "I am _not_ a virgin." 

"Okay, okay, it doesn't make a difference to me Cas. Really..." 

The sad truth was there was only one girl, one time back at University. She was a bitch though. It turned out to be some hazing to get into one of the fraternities on campus. To get with the in crowd or something. And there Cas had thought he had left all that trivial stuff behind at high school. Her name had been April he thinks. Maybe she was why sexually he had very little interest in women. Socially and in the business world he actually found them quite nice and intriguing. 

"What about you? I suppose you have lain with many women," Cas said as he cooled off.

Dean paused and looked like he was trying to figure out how exactly to respond to that question. "Yeah, I guess. I've slept around a lot," Dean gave a stiff smile before frowning down at his hands. "Guess I'm kind of a whore huh?" 

Cas looked at Dean and shook his head. He watched the way his lips twitched and his green eyes glanced to the corners to look at Cas. "I wouldn't say that." 

"Well everyone else would. They come to me for one night stands or quickies or something. Then they go and tell all their friends, 'Oh I slept with Dean Winchester'. Being famous isn't all it's cracked up to be," he bit down on his bottom lip and Cas continued to examine him as he was speaking. He had freckles. Cas hadn't noticed before. Maybe you just had to really pay attention to him to notice them. And his jaw was perfect, lined with stubble and Cas had the irresistible urge to lean over and kiss the spot where it met just below his ear but above his neck. 

"You aren't a whore, Dean. That's a derogatory word used to make those who find pleasure in sleeping with others feel bad about themselves. The way I see it in reality you are just having fun and giving pleasure to someone else in return. Not something you should be judged for. That isn't a negative thing is it? Giving someone else pleasure?" Cas stopped when he noticed Dean was laughing softly, green eyes finally having met Cas's and they softened even more into a look Cas hadn't seen on Dean, or frankly anyone before. He wondered what it meant, the soft eyes watching him, the smile pulling up just the corners of his lips as if he were thinking of a secret he couldn't share.

After that they each got another beer and Dean ordered them a few shots. Cas had never taken shots before but he watched Dean and did as he did. He squinted, coughing as the liquid went down, burning his throat. "You do this for pleasure?" 

"Just wait till it kicks in," Dean grinned at him and they each took two more. That's when Cas started getting dizzy again, the happy kind of dizzy and Dean pulled him out to the dance floor which had started back up in full swing since it had gotten dark outside. This time Dean didn't disappear into the crowd, he stayed right in sight of Cas, always reachable. Cas wanted to reach out and touch him but he refrained as another girl started grinding on him. He could feel Dean's eyes, feel him watching him and for some reason that made him want to dance even more. He turned around and grabbed the girl's waist like they do in the moves and the rubbed their hips against one another. 

Eventually she took off to find another guy and Cas was left crazily dancing by himself. Dean of course was around there somewhere but he couldn't see him from the direction he was currently facing. As the night wore on Cas wore out and he was very much drunk. The lights were flashing and they had just changed the song when a guy walked up to Cas, a few inches taller than him, muscular and very much interested in Cas. Cas could hardly believe it. They danced together, grinding against one another. He saw Dean a couple times, but he didn't seem happy. Cas wondered what was wrong. It wasn't until the man Cas was dancing with took hold of Cas's blue tie and started pulling him off the dance floor that Dean approaced them again. 

"Lay off, Tucker," Dean growled. This Tucker was barely taller than Dean and about his same build. 

"I'm just taking him into the back to have a little fun. He wants it, look at him," Tucker nodded towards Cas who grinned brightly at Dean. Cas was definitely into some more fun. It wasn't until he noticed flash in Dean's eyes and the large bulge in this Tucker's pants that Cas really got the gist of what kind of fun he was supposed to be having. Despite having only dreamed about a situation like this Cas suddenly felt nervous and uneasy. Were they really going to do this in a bathroom? How? Had this man been properly checked? How far exactly did he think Cas wanted to go. 

"I don't care Tuck. He's drunk, you'll just be taking advantage of him." 

"You're drunk too Winchester. It's not often we too many new guys in here that bend my direction." 

Dean's hands were balled into fists, now by his side, ready to fight if need be. Cas barely noticed this, but he did notice. He noticed the stare down they were having and the way Tucker's hand was still curled around his tie. Cas didn't want to get into the middle of this. Part of him wanted this, a lot, but another part didn't want to make Dean mad. He'd rather be pressed up against a bathroom wall with Dean, or bent over a sink with him. He trusted Dean. Dean wasn't just a random person he'd met in a club. Sure Cas didn't know him well, but he knew him better than this Tucker. "He's mine Tucker. Get lost," Dean warned and just like that Tucker let go of Cas's tie and walked away. He was Dean's? What was going on? "Are you okay?" Dean asked him and Cas nodded. "I think... I think we better leave." Dean was used to getting drunk and he obviously wasn't as highly intoxicated as Cas was. Cas just nodded and Dean reached back, taking his hand and pulling him through the crowd. 

When they got outside the street was quiet, only a couple street and business lights on, just enough to light the way. The only sounds came from insects and the music still pulsing from inside the bar. Dean dragged Cas down the street, slow enough so Cas wouldn't trip or anything like that. Cas kept playing through Dean's words in his head, his heart pounding in his chest as he gripped Dean's hand tightly. They got closer to the auto shop and Dean pulled him around to a side entrance, probably where he got into his house. 

"Dean?" Cas asked, wobbling slightly on his feet before he leaned up against the wall. Dean looked over at him, frozen under the porch light. 

"Yes Cas?" 

"What did you mean back at the bar? What did you mean, that I'm yours?"


	9. The Dam Breaks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut! Warning! Very detailed smut! There's no going back.

Cas stood there blinking at Dean for what seemed like the longest time before Dean let out a grunt and unlocked the door without answering Cas's question. Cas though, unfazed by this, followed Dean inside and asked him again. "What did you mean that I'm yours?" His head was tilted to the side as he watched Dean, barely glancing around his home. 

"I can't drive you back to the hotel. I didn't think this through. You can crash on my couch if you want," Dean grumbled. Cas didn't understand why Dean was so touchy. This time he sat down on the couch and looked around Dean's small house. He could only see the living room and kitchen from here though. There was hallway between them that probably led to the auto shop and there was a hallway on the opposite wall beside the couch Cas was currently sitting on that looked like it had a couple bedrooms and a bathroom. The house was clean, but it didn't look very homey. There weren't paintings or anything personal really except a hunting rifle mounted above the television across the room. It was dark right now, hard to see colors because the only light was the one in the kitchen that Dean had turned on when he walked in. Although it wasn't really anything special it did seem comfortable. Cas wished his apartment looked more like this than what it was, one giant office. Papers on the coffee table and the counters and the kitchen table. Everywhere there was empty space something was piled up.

Dean had disappeared off somewhere while Cas was looking around, leaving him alone in the silent room. A clock was ticking from somewhere and the air conditioning kicked on, humming as it started to cool off the house. Suddenly a door closed from behind him and Cas peered down the hallway, seeing Dean standing and carrying something. He walked up and tossed a couple blankets and a pillow down beside Cas. "I hope this will work for you." 

"They will suffice," Cas nodded looking at them. Dean nodded too and looked down at him, then he turned towards the kitchen and Cas stood, following him. "Dean?" 

Dean turned when he reached the fridge, opening it and pulling out a bottle of water, handing it to Cas before taking one for himself. He twisted the cap off and took a few drinks of it before setting it on the counter and replying with, "Yes, Cas?"

"What did you mean?" Cas asked again. The whole situation was bothering him more than it should have and he swallowed hard, teeth grazing his bottom lip as he watched Dean lean back against the counter and run a hand through his hair. "I need to know Dean."

The new silence between them wasn't comfortable. There was something electric in the air. Maybe it was the way Dean was looking at him, over him, his gaze settling on Cas's mouth for a moment before he looked back down and licked his lips. "I don't think you want to know Cas..."

"I want to know Dean. Tell me," Cas took a step closer, begging Dean. 

"Cas, I can't."

"Please Dean."

"Cas-"

"Just tell me!" 

"Cas, would you... for the love of God!" Dean cried before grabbing Cas by his trench coat and pulling him forward, crashing their lips together. Cas, for a moment, was too stunned to do anything besides nearly melting into the kiss, his heart racing. After that moment it kicked in that he should be doing something and his lips timidly began moving alongside Dean's. Dean's however moved expertly, confidently and he licked at Cas's bottom lip, nudging his tongue inside Cas's mouth. It all made Cas's knees weak and he reached up, grabbing onto Dean's arms to keep himself steady. 

Just when Cas thought his lungs would explode Dean pulled back and rested his forehead against Cas's, breathing heavily to catch his own breath. His hands released from Cas's trench coat, one falling to Cas's side, the other spread out and pressed flat against Cas's chest. "There, are you happy now?" He asked, looking down at Cas. Cas stared back up into his green eyes and nodded softly at which point Dean's gaze seemed to change. His lips that had been slightly tugging down at the corners lifted just enough that now they were barely tugging up, and his eyes brightened just a little. "I've been wanting to do that since I met you," he chuckled and now Cas was smiling gently too. 

"I've wanted you to do that since I met you," he breathed out. There was a moment of silence before Cas leaned up, pressing his lips back against Dean's. This time he was more confident. Dean wanted this too, and that made all the difference. His hands lifted from their place on Dean's arms and he grabbed his shoulders, pulling him down closer. Dean backed him against the counter, one of his hands on Cas's face, coaxing him forward. They wanted each other, more of each other. 

Cas could hardly believe this was happening. He hoped he wasn't too drunk to remember this in the morning. He wanted to remember this for the rest of his life. Teeth gently grazed Cas's bottom lip and he moaned into Dean's mouth. Dean wedged his knee in between Cas's legs, his hands pulled at Cas's blue tie, slipping it off and tossing it aside. Cas wasn't quite as adventurous with his hands as Dean was, keeping them firmly on Dean's shoulders as Dean felt around under Cas's trench coat, untucking his white button down from his pants. 

"Bedroom," Dean growled softly and Cas felt his cock twitch in the confines of his boxer-briefs. He nodded weakly in compliance as Dean quite literally picked him up by the ass after ridding him of his trench coat which fell and puddled on the kitchen floor. Cas yelped, legs tightening around Dean's waist as the man carried him down the dark hallway and pushed open the door to his bedroom. His mouth never left Cas's, only occasionally breaking for soft moans or to catch their breath. 

Dean laid Cas down onto his bed, climbing on top of him. This was really happening and Cas could barely wrap his mind around it. He could barely think as it was, everything a little hazy around the edges except the way he felt, and Dean felt touching him. There was no way he could ignore that. He whimpered as Dean's mouth left his, his own lips now kiss swollen and tender as he tried to breathe. But Dean's mouth trailed the wet kisses down his jaw and his neck, his fingers unbuttoning Cas's shirt and leaving him exposed to all of Dean's wonderful torture. He sucked a mark onto Cas, right below his collar bone, tonguing over it. Cas's fingers tangled into Dean's short crop of hair and he arched into Dean's touches which trailed all over his chest, rib by rib as if committing Cas's body to memory. 

Cas was getting a little more daring, pushing his hands under Dean's jacket and tossing it aside once he got it off. After all here Dean was undressing Cas while he was still fully clothed. It didn't seem fair. Especially since Cas really wanted to see what was underneath. His fingers pushed up, under the hem of Dean's shirt and pressed themselves into his hipbones before trailing up over lines of hard muscle and hot skin. He was really as firm as he looked and Cas couldn't get enough after that one touch, needing to feel all of Dean's upper body.

Dean's hands continued to roam Cas's. They were calloused from years of work and labor but they were warm and reassuring in a way as they smoothed over Cas's skin or teased his nipples, making Cas writhe under his touch. Eventually though his fingers came down, brushing over the thin trail of dark hair that disappeared into Cas's pants. Then they were on Cas's belt, unbuckling it, tossing it aside before reaching the pants themselves, working away the button and pulling down the zipper. Cas lifted his ass so Dean could slip them off and his own fingers pushed Dean's shirt off before fumbling with the buttons on his lover's currently seemingly too tight jeans. 

Dean moaned in relief when his pants came off revealing a pair of plain black boxers to Cas's wandering eyes. Cas palmed them from the outside and Dean's hips rubbed down into his hand revealing a large and very hard cock underneath the fabric. Cas swallowed hard, heart beating against his ribcage with anticipation. After a moment of rutting himself against Cas's hand Dean leaned down and pressed their hips together. Cas's hands curled tighter around Dean as he greedily jerked his hips up, their swollen cocks brushing each other through the fabric. Cas let out a throaty groan and he knew they had to get the layers off, nothing separating them. 

His fingers grabbed at the waistband of Dean's boxer, pulling them down and over Dean's cock. He didn't know how the hell it was going to fit inside him but he wanted it. Dean pulled his boxer-briefs down too and Cas moaned at the relief. He didn't think he was going to be able to take it anymore if he had to stay confined in those. "Dean..." he moaned out and Dean answered by leaning down and kissing the head of Cas's cock softly which resulted in Cas moaning louder. 

He'd never been with a man before and Cas didn't know what was expected of him. He was worried that Dean would expect Cas to suck him off in return but Cas and his gag reflex had him nervous. "Dean... I've never..." he looked up at him through lust blown eyes. 

"Don't worry about it. You don't have to do anything you don't want to. Just lay back and relax," Dean smiled up at him and Cas breathed a sigh of relief which quickly turned into a high pitched whine as Dean's tongue licked up the underside of his cock before sucking the head into his mouth. He was holding Cas's hips down so they wouldn't buck up into his mouth as much as Cas struggled beneath him making all sorts of noises he never knew were possible. 

Cas had never felt anything like this before. It was heavenly in the most adulterated way. Dean's tongue slid along the slit in the head of his cock and it felt like everything on Cas was sent into overdrive. His fingers were back in Dean's hair. He tried to not pull it too tight as Dean bobbed his head down, taking all of Cas into his mouth. He sucked him, bobbing his head up and down and humming, sending vibrations through Cas's cock and driving him absolutely mad until he was sure he was going to cum. Right as he reached that edge though Dean pulled away and Cas whimpered, looking up at him. 

"Not yet," Dean smirked softly and he crawled over Cas, reaching into his nightstand for something Cas couldn't see. Then he pulled back, holding a bottle in the palm of his hand and Cas bit down on his bottom lip, watching it as Dean squirted some of the lube onto his fingers and rubbed it along the length of his cock while Cas watched. When he finished lubing his cock he took the leftover onto his fingers and spread Cas's legs, pressing it against Cas's tight, puckering hole. Cas pressed his hips down towards Dean's fingers as his hands tightened into the sheets on Dean's bed.

The fingers teased around the area until Dean gently pushed one inside of Cas up to the knuckle. Cas clenched down around the digit. It burned slightly and it only now occurred to him how much this was going to hurt. Then Dean pushed the finger the rest of the way in and Cas realized that he really didn't care. Dean soon slipped another finger deep inside of Cas, scissoring him open and stretching him out. He did this for a few minutes keeping Cas in rapture of him and everything he was feeling down below. 

When Dean pulled all fingers out Cas clenched around nothing, groaning at the loss. Dean shut him up though, leaning down and kissing him again as his hands nudged Cas's legs a little wider. "I'm gonna go slow," he said when he paused for air. Cas could only nod in response. 

That was about the time that Dean reached down between them, guiding his cock to press against Cas's entrance. Cas took a deep breath right before Dean started pushing inside of him. It burned a lot worse than the fingers, stretching him what seemed impossibly wide until the head of his cock was all the way inside of Cas and Dean paused, looking up at him. 

"You okay?" He asked and Cas nodded again. His teeth dug into his bottom lip and he was white knuckling the sheets with his hands. As Dean let him adjust to this small part of him he reachedbup, unfurling Cas's hands and placing them onto Dean. "It's okay. I want you to touch me okay?" 

"I dont want to hurt you," Cas tried to explain, resisting the urge to bite his nails into Dean's skin. 

"You won't, it's fine," Dean assured. Then he placed his own hands back on Cas's hips and resumed the slow push into Cas. This time his dug his nails into Dean's shoulders but Dean didn't seem fazed. Cas whimpered but tougher it out. 

Once Dean was all the way inside Cas he paused again, just for a moment, reaching over and taking Cas's cock into his hand, rubbing his thumb over the sensitive head. The mixture of pain and pleasure was the weirdest thing Cas had experienced but it did help take his mind off the throbbing in his ass. 

Slowly thrn Dean pulled himself back out, and pushed himself back in. The first few thrusts were still painful for Cas, but Dean was careful with him and eventually the pain turned into something else entirely and his whimpers of pain turned into moans. 

Cas relaxed back against the bed, hands tugging at Dean to pull him closer instead of using him as some kind of purchase. Dean took this as a sign to go faster and deeper. Cas tried to meet his thrusts as best as he could pinned against the bed. 

Sweat was beading over Cas's back, between his shoulder blades and he arched up occasionally or tried pulling Dean down against him. It felt good, really good and he wondered why he'd ever waited to do this. 

Suddenly a white hot pleasure spread through Cas's body and he cried out as Dean hit the sweet spot inside of him. As good as it felt he really hadn't been getting anywhere until that. A second later it was hit again and he bit gently into Dean's shoulder to muffle his cries of pleasure. 

"Dean please..." He begged. He was close now, each hit to his prostate giving him a good hard shove towards the edge. Dean grunted in response, his hands grabbing under Cas's lower back to arch him up and give him a better angle to reach him from. His cock was wedged in between his own stomach and Dean's which was rubbing against it. 

The tightness in his stomach built, twisting and pulling, building up into a fire. His cock was hardening between them and he whimpered helplessly. "Dean, I'm going to..." He tried to warn, his breathing erratic and shallow. He could feel Dean's cock hardening inside of him too and he suddenly realized they hadn't used anything. The thought was there and gone though as another intense wave of pleasure flooded him and he struggled to hold on. 

"Cum for me Cas..." Dean grunted and the words were all Cas needed to let himself let go. He cried out loudly and he buried his face into Dean's chest, panting and heaving as his cock released between them, hot cum covering both of their stomachs. His hole spasmed around Dean's cock which must have sent him over the edge because the jerk of his hips faltered and then there was a hot warmth inside of Cas, making him whimper. Dean kept thrusting for a little before he stopped, releasing the rest of his load inside of Cas as his own cock began to soften and he collapsed back against the bed. 

"Shit..." Dean panted and looked down at Cas who was trying to recover from his orgasm induced high. He gently slipped himself out of Cas which left him feeling empty and dirty as cum started dripping out of him. "I'll clean you up," he whispered and Cas nodded, cold as Dean got up off of him and walked out to somewhere. 

He came back with a damp washcloth and he wiped the cum from Cas before tending to himself and tossing the washcloth into a laundry hamper in the corner of the room. 

"So much for the couch," Cas tried to say weakly, now more exhausted than he could imagine. Dean chuckled and shook his head softly. 

"Go to sleep Cas," he said softly, laying down beside him and wrapping his arms around Cas's waist, pulling him closer. Cas didn't even nod this time, just closed his eyes and quickly fell asleep to the sound of Dean's still slightly labored breathing.


	10. Day Break

The next morning Cas woke up with a pounding headache. He wasn't even sure if it was really morning. The sun wasn't up yet which he was glad for, otherwise the pain behind his eyes may have been a lot worse. He was surprisingly comfortable other than that. It really took him a little bit to remember what had happened last night and what that was pressed against his back. He stiffened and swallowed hard, almost in shock. 

What had he been thinking? He'd actually slept with Dean Winchester. Which explained his sore ass. He was still here in his bed, his clothes scattered across Dean's room. For some reason Cas was scared. This whole thing scared him now that he was sober, or relatively so, and not in the heat of the moment. He wasn't used to getting close with another person, emotionally or physically. Here he seemed to have risked it all and he panicked, heart pounding in his chest.

He didn't know what to do for a moment. Dean had an arm wrapped around his waist, keeping him pressed back against his chest. And as much as the whole thing was appealing, just to go back to sleep next to Dean, Cas shied away. While he laid there, petrified, he stared around the room, trying to find his clothes that had been tossed on the floor. He was missing his tie and trench coat which he vaguely remembered had been deposited in the kitchen. Slowly and carefully Cas slipped himself out of Dean's grip and went to pick up his clothes, not even daring to start putting them back on until he was in the hallway, door shut safely behind him, closing in the room which still smelled of alcohol and sex. 

What was wrong with him? That had been the greatest thing to happen to him in even he didn't know how long and he was running away. He ran away from all the good things that happened to him. But still there he was hurriedly grabbing his trench coat and tie off the kitchen floor before hurrying outside of Dean's home. He didn't even bother putting them back on, choosing to walk back to his hotel in just his white button up shirt and dress pants. No one would see him anyways, it was too early. The sun was just about to creep over the horizon but it was still mostly dark. 

When Cas finally reached the hotel he quietly tip toed down the hall in case anyone else was occupying the place and he might wake them. Then he opened his door and slipped inside, hurriedly changing into pajamas and crawling into the bed, turning the television on as he laid back down. He set up his phone charger and placed his phone on his nightstand, anything to try and take his mind off of what had happened. 

Strangely enough, now that he was gone he regretted it. He wished he could have stayed. But the idea of actually staying, as appealing as it was, still sent his stomach into a ball of nerves and he didn't know why. It had definitely felt amazing. Right. Something he wouldn't hesitate to experience again. The reluctance had to be from letting Dean so close to him. Even though their relations last night had been purely physical in nature. 

No one had ever touched him like that before. Caressed his body like it was something important that deserved to be worshiped. No one looked at him like that, with such need and passion and want. And most definitely, no one had ever kissed him like that before. It had been enough to take Cas's breath away. But now here he was, back in his hotel room, alone. 

Sighing he tried turning over onto his side and pulling the blankets around him tightly to warm himself up. It wasn't enough and he settled for placing the two extra pillows on the bed behind his back. He could imagine that it felt like Dean behind him even though his logical mind prevented him from really thinking of it. Still he fell back asleep curled up in the sheets, mind and heart still tossing back and forth whether it had been right to leave Dean like that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for such a short chapter. The next one will be longer I promise! Keep enjoying and check out my article on the magic of fanfiction! https://geeks.media/the-magic-of-fan-fiction?_ga=2.111970820.142276998.1506912793-416789174.1506912793


	11. Not Broken

When Cas woke up it was because his phone was buzzing on the nightstand. He picked it up, looking at the screen with bleary eyes. The screen told him it was one Dean Winchester. He didn't remember logging Dean's number into his contacts but he must have if the caller ID came up. He bit his lip and debated whether to answer it. Before he could make a decision though the phone went silent and he sighed, reaching up and rubbing a hand through his already disheveled, still sex crazed, hair. He swiped at the screen and frowned when it came up. He had mail. 

Really, not mail. It was text messages and phone called. About five or so of the messages and four phone calls, all that Cas hadn't answered or hadn't heard. He clicked on the messages first, not ready to feel the way his heart jumped at hearing Dean's voice. Especially not when he knew he'd left him this morning. Clicking on Dean's name he scrolled to the top of the screen and began reading the text messages Dean had sent him. 

_(8:15 a.m.) Hey Cas. It's me. Dean. What happened to you this morning?_

_(8:52 a.m.) Cas it's me again. Where did you go?_

_(9:34 a.m.) Did something happen? Why aren't you answering me?_

_(10:36 a.m.) Cas, I just called you but you didn't answer me. I think we need to talk._

_(11:21 a.m.) Did I do something wrong Cas? Please answer me._

_(12:03 p.m.) Come on Cas. You have to be getting these. At least tell me what I did wrong. We really need to talk. I've called you three times. Do I need to stop by the hotel?_

Cas frowned the more he read through them. He felt bad for not answering them. He was worrying Dean. Dean obviously wanted to see him again so he should feel better but it only made him feel worse. He took a breath before he went to his voice mail, waiting for the first message from Dean to pull up. 

_"Cas... I don't know what happened last night... or this morning. Whenever. I woke up and you weren't here and... what happened Cas? Why aren't you answering my messages? Call me back. Or text me. Either one, anything really."_

The sound of Dean's voice on the line sent pleasant shivers down Cas's spine and he gripped his cell a little tighter in his palm. 

_"I can't stop thinking about this Cas. I need to know what's going on. It's driving me to hell and back. What did I do?"_

_"Cas if you don't answer this I'm coming over."_

There was one more, the one where he must have just called.

_"I'm coming over Cas. I can't take this anymore. I need to know what's going on and we really need to talk. Really. I'll be over in five._

The messages stopped and Cas ended the call to voice mail before going to the call log. It had been a little over three minutes ago when Dean sent that and Cas swallowed thickly. Dean was going to be here soon. Dean was going to come here and they were going to talk. But first Cas would have to be able to look him in the eyes. He didn't know what he was going to do. This was ridiculous.

He sat on the bed, phone still in his hand though the screen had gone black. He must have sat there for a few minutes, blankly staring at the wall in front of him as his insides twisted and he panicked about what he was going to do when Dean got there. That's why when he heard a knock at the door he jumped, dropping his phone. He bent over to pick it up with shaking hands and put it on the night table before tentatively going to open the door.

Dean was looking right at him as if he'd seen him through the door. Cas felt like he shrunk down some with the way Dean was looking at him. His eyes looked concerned and they scanned Cas up and down, but his face was hard and serious. "We need to talk Cas. I don't know why you've been ignoring me," he stepped inside when Cas let him, closing the door behind him. Cas walked over to the bed, trying to avoid Dean's gaze as he sat down uncomfortably on the edge of the bed. 

"I was not ignoring you. That was not my intention. I had fallen asleep. I didn't hear my phone," Cas mumbled softly. Dean stayed standing, kind of pacing the floor in front of him. 

"Well then why didn't you message me when you got up?" Dean asked, incredulous of it all. Cas merely shrugged though he knew he was too nervous to reply. Just not nervous enough to stop Dean from coming over to see him. He knew inside that he really did want to see him again and the way his stomach fluttered by just having Dean in the same room as him proved it. "What happened this morning. Why did you leave?" 

Cas shrugged again and mumbled out an, "I don't know," which was only partially true. 

"You're really frustrating you know that?" Dean asked with a grumble. He sat down on the edge of the bed with a thump, not looking over at Cas, glaring instead at his shoes. "Tell me this at least, what did you think last night was to you? Because I don't do that with just anybody Cas. I thought after that whole thing that we liked each other, actually liked each other. Did you just go off of all the stuff we talked about in the bar? Because yes I sleep with a lot of people but... was I just another one night stand or something? I don't get it. I'm getting mixed signals here." 

Cas finally got up the nerve to look at Dean and the man actually looked a little hurt, or disappointed. He realized he didn't want to be the one to make Dean look like that and it gave him enough courage to say, "I really like you too. I didn't think of it as a one night stand. I don't think of _you_ like that."

"Then why did you leave this morning without telling me? It seemed a whole hell of a lot like you had just been trying to get away..." 

Cas sighed, chewed the inside of cheek in the silence that followed. He ducked his head for a minute before looking back up, but into a corner of the room away from Dean. "I'm... nervous." He didn't want to say scared. That would sound too stupid. 

"About what?" Dean seemed to relax a little bit. 

"About getting close to someone, you. I'm not used to that. Or having people I like return those feelings for me," he continued to bore holes into the wall with his stare. 

"Why does that make you nervous?" Dean asked, tilting his head a little as he tried to understand what Cas was telling him. 

"I don't let anyone into my life. It keeps me from getting hurt," Cas felt he could blame that problem on April.

"And you think I'm going to hurt you?" Dean scooted a little closer to him, carefully as if approaching a timid animal. Cas didn't shy away. 

"I don't know. How am I supposed to know who will really hurt me in the end?"

"Well I guess you don't. But you could hurt me too. You know? We have to take that chance if we want to try this. I'm willing to if you are. We don't even have to call it dating, we can just... see how things go?" 

"What kind of things?" Cas looked up at him, breath catching in his throat when he saw how close Dean was now. He could count all the freckles on Dean's face if he wanted to. 

"Just anything. We'll see how we feel. Does that sound good?" Dean spoke softly and Cas blinked down at his lips, watching them carefully. Those and his green eyes with the laugh lines around his eyes at the outside corners and dark lashes that made the green just that more intense. 

"Yes. That sounds good," Cas nodded, relaxing a little bit more. There was another short silence where they both seemed to study each other's faces and then Cas asked, "Dean?" 

"Mhmm?" 

"What are you feeling right now?" 

Dean's eyes flickered back to meet Cas's and he held it while he whispered, "I feel a lot like doing this..." and he leaned forward, kissing Cas again. Cas's chest swelled like a balloon and all the tension that had been plaguing him evaporated. He leaned into Dean, their thighs brushing as Cas's hand came up and grabbed the collar of Dean's jacket, pulling him closer. When they both broke for air Dean reached for Cas's hand, their fingers intertwining. For some reason this felt more romantic than even their sex and kissing. Maybe because Dean had sex so many times. He knew what he was doing. It was for pleasure more than romance or feelings though maybe doing it with someone you actually liked just made it better. But he wondered how many times Dean had done something like this, just holding someone's hand. 

"Will you stay here with me?" Cas asked and looked up at Dean. 

"What do you want me to do if I stay here?" Dean asked, his voice soft and curious. Cas had hoped Dean wouldn't think he wanted sex right now, because he didn't, but Dean didn't seem to be implying that either. 

"I don't know. Anything you want. Just... stay with me. I think it will feel nice." 

Dean smiled, his eyes crinkling and he nodded. "Okay, I'll stay. But if someone calls and needs something fixed I'll have to go okay?" his thumb rubbed over the back of Cas's hand. 

"Okay, that sounds fair," Cas smiled and leaned back against the head board, pulling Dean up with him.


	12. Broken Silence

Dean sat with Cas for a long time and they talked about random things. Dean told Cas all about Sam. How even though Sam left him and the family business to be with Jess that he was still a good guy and Dean was proud of him. He was proud of everything Sam accomplished and he didn't miss any of his award ceremonies. He thought Jess was nice too. He wanted to get back on Sam's good side. They'd had a falling out when he left and they had a huge argument. At least he and their father did. Dean was forced to watch Sam walk out and he always thought that Sam left him too. The only time he'd seen Sam since was at their dad's funeral. 

"I'm sure Sam would love to see you again," Cas looked down at Dean's hand, tracing the lines on it with his fingertip. 

"I don't know. He barely acknowledged my existence at the funeral." 

"Maybe he just didn't know what to say," he offered this time and glanced up into Dean's green eyes. "You should try it. You obviously care about him. I don't know what I'd do without my brother." 

This then sparked a conversation about Cas's brother. Well brothers really. He had three. His oldest brother Michael wasn't around much. He was always working, trying to follow through with their father's plans even though he had left them. Michael blamed Cas for that too. It was all Cas's fault. Lucifer was in prison after doing some things that no one had ever really explained to Cas because he had been too young. He only had a couple memories of him though he'd always been nice back then. He was always dad's favorite. Then there was Gabriel. Gabriel did everything with Cas. He was the one who taught him how to ride a bike, he always stuck up for Cas whenever Dad or Michael yelled at him. He was the only one who was ever really nice to Cas, even though Cas never saw him much anymore with all the work he did. 

"Well, I'm glad you had him then," Dean said. "You deserve someone who looks out for you." 

Cas smiled and they kept talking. Just random things. Then Cas decided it was time for him to work on the report and he pulled out his computer. Dean didn't mind and he took the television remote, spreading himself out over Cas's legs and flipping through channels as Cas typed away. it was a comfortable silence. Something he could get used to. They were both together without having to really be together.

He worked hard, kept researching for hours on end. When Dean saw he was getting frustrated he sat up and gently pulled Cas's computer into his own lap. "Break time," he smiled softly and Cas sighed, falling back against the bed. 

"I don't have time for a break." 

"Well you need one and you're more important than getting this report done. There won't be any job for you to still have if you work yourself to death," Dean closed the laptop and put it to the side, scooting up next to Cas. "So what do you want to do for your break?" he asked Cas and took his hand. 

Cas felt his cheeks heat up a little bit when Dean took his hand, not entirely used to it though it wasn't a bad feeling in the least. He shrugged and tentatively leaned against Dean. "I don't know. Nothing really."

"You can't really tell me that you're tired and you want to sleep or something? You slept almost all day. I should know, it felt like forever," he chuckled.

"No, not sleep, I just want to lay here and do nothing. I need to do nothing. Well, maybe sleep. A nap sounds good," Cas's face heated up just a little more because he knew he really had been asleep for a long time.

"Alright then. Let's take a nap Sleeping Beauty," Dean teased and Cas looked down at their intertwined hands.

"I'm not a Disney princess," Cas mumbled.

"It was a joke. I know you aren't. Come on, let's just take a nap." Dean settled down against the pillows and pulled Cas down next to him, pulling him closer by the waist. Cas found it surprisingly comforting and he pressed his face into the space between Dean's neck and chest. He smelled like auto shop and wood and a little bit of pine and cinnamon. It was good and relaxing and Cas hinted another smell below it all that had to just be Dean's own smell. Dean tucked Cas's head there and sighed contently and he let Cas fall asleep like that. They didn't sleep long though. About an hour later Dean's phone rang and it woke Cas up too as Dean reached out to pick it up. He was officially on duty and he had to leave, leaning down and kissing Cas softly before he left, shutting the door quietly behind him. Cas couldn't go back to sleep though and he sat up, grabbing at his computer again and opening it, blinking at the light from the screen. It was time to get back to work.


	13. Breaking the Pattern

Cas hadn't heard from Dean since he left and he checked his phone more than enough times. Normally he was too busy with work to notice that he even had a phone, now it felt like he couldn't put it down. Before Dean left he had told Cas that he'd text him or call him later but Cas hadn't gotten a message yet. This, for some reason, really bothered Cas. He wanted to hear from Dean, anything would be good. But nothing came and Cas, as is usual of his nature, began to worry.

It wasn't for another hour that Cas heard anything. There was a beep on his phone, the default text tone that he never bothered to change, and Cas nearly lunged for his phone. There was a new text message and Cas breathed a sigh of relief as he opened it and saw Dean's name lit up. He clicked on it and opened it up to read what Dean had to say. 

_(6:24 p.m.) Just got off. Do you want me to come back?_

Cas grinned and quickly wrote back. 

_(6:25 p.m.) As long as you are okay with it, yes, I would appreciate that._

He sent the text and sat back, staring at his phone for what felt like ever, barely aware of the report he had to finish on the screen of his laptop still. He stared at it until the screen lit up and it beeped again with Dean's new message. 

_(6:28 p.m.) On my way then. Picking up food. I'll get you something. When I get there, no more work._

Cas smiled softly to himself before putting his phone down beside him and turning back to his computer. He had to finish this report.

Dean was back not even thirty minutes later with burgers and fries from the diner. Cas could get used to this and his face lit up when Dean came in the door with the greasy paper bags. 

"What did I tell you?" Dean asked as he set the food on the desk and came over to the foot of the bed by Cas's legs. 

"Hmm?" Cas asked, continuing to type and glancing up at Dean between it all. 

"I said no more work. You don't need to work all the time Cas. It's not good for you," Dean pointed out and reached out for Cas's laptop about to close it. 

"Wait!" Cas pulled it back. "Just let me save it first." He quickly did just that and then Dean closed the laptop, laying it off to the side. 

"You know..." Dean said, spreading out on his side and looking up at Cas. "I need to keep an eye on you constantly, make sure you aren't overworking yourself. I can't really do that when you're all the way in this hotel room all the time. Especially at night. How would you feel about checking out of here and coming to stay with me?" he smirked a little. "You know you don't really have to sleep in my bed or anything. I'll even take the couch if you wanted, I just figured, it would save you money that you'd be spending on the room and I can confiscate this whenever I feel necessary." 

Cas really hadn't been expecting that at all. "You want me to move in with you? Isn't that moving a little fast?" he asked in all seriousness, not quite understanding Dean's offer. 

"Not really moving in, just staying while I fix your car," Dean explained. This of course brought up something they had both avoided talking about. When Dean finished Cas's car, then what would happen? But neither of them actually said anything about it. 

"I suppose then that would be alright," Cas smiled and looked down at him. "I wouldn't mind sharing the bed with you. We already have. I don't see how it would be any different." 

"I know but some people might not see it that way," Dean smiled up at him. "So do you want to come over tonight or tomorrow or...?" 

Cas suddenly felt excited. "Tonight. After we eat. I'll pack my stuff up and we can go over," he smiled. 

"Okay. I'm glad you chose to stay with me. I can't wait to get you back to my place. I'm sure we can find some fun things to do while you're over," Dean smirked again and Cas felt a shiver run down his spine at the very obvious implications to sex. 

"I'm sure we could," Cas's face blushed a light red and Dean's smirk softened into a smile and he leaned up to kiss him softly. 

"Has anyone ever told you how adorable you are?" he asked Cas and Cas frowned. 

"I'm not adorable. Adorable is for children Dean. And puppies. Not grown men."

"It can be. Don't worry you're a lot of good things, currently though you are mostly adorable. I'm sure I'll have a few other things to call you tonight though. Now come on, let's eat so we can get you back to my place," Dean sat up and went to go get the greasy bags, sitting down beside Cas and handing him one of the burgers. "Eat up, you'll need the energy," he joked softly and Cas felt himself blush again. Maybe he _was_ adorable.


	14. Breaking Walls

Once they had finished eating it didn't take Cas long to get his stuff packed together. He also insisted on making the bed despite Dean pointing out that that's why they had a maid service. Maybe it was really Cas just making up for all the times he never actually did that at his apartment. So he was ready rather quickly and definitely eager to get back to Dean's. The implications of sex had been ringing in the back of his mind through the whole meal and normally there was nothing about sex that intrigued him this much so he figured it just had to do with Dean. 

"Okay, we all set?" Dean asked him and Cas did a double check of the room before nodding. "Then let's get you in the car and all your bags loaded up. Actually how about I take those out to the car and you can sign yourself out?" he then offered for Cas, already reaching over and slipping one of the bags off of Cas's shoulder.

Cas found this to be a good idea and closed the door on the hotel room for the last time before he went up to the front desk. Dean had went to of course put the bags in the car and drive around to get him. The woman at the desk didn't even question why he was checking out so late at night. She was too busy with her daughter who was very obviously bored. Cas was grateful for this because certainly if she had asked and with his blatant statements he'd weed out somehow that he was not only going home with the town mechanic and handyman but he was also planning on having sex with him. Just thinking of that made Cas grin and shift a little. 

Their last time having sex had been passionate yet Dean had gone easy on him. This time Cas hoped he did whatever it was Dean did best in bed. Cas himself wasn't that experienced but he had the fortune of having Dean who was and could show him everything he was missing out on. He closed his eyes, leaning against the counter and imagined what could happen tonight. He wasn't disappointed in his imagination which quite frankly he hadn't known could be so dirty. He was jerked out of his pleasant thoughts however when the lady told him to have a nice night. He cleared his throat and wished her the same before walking outside and to the impala which was idling in the parking lot. 

Cas slid inside the impala and shut the door behind him, barely having enough time to get his seat belt on before Dean was on the road. It seemed he wasn't the only eager one tonight. This time Cas wouldn't run away in the morning, he'd be able to sleep in and lay in Dean's warm arms all he wanted. Their relationship wasn't exactly practical at the moment but it was working and without the date nights that normal couples seemed to have early on in their relationship they still had normal things like watching television or eating breakfast in the mornings or something. It made up for it. 

The drive over seemed too long. A lot longer than usual at least now that Cas really wanted over there. Instead of being able to feel Dean's hands on him he had to imagine to hold him over and as he was picturing he realized that this time he wouldn't be in the same drunken haze that he had been the first time. The memories of their sex had been jumbled together and a little off, this time he'd be able to enjoy the experience in full. 

Dean pulled into the shop finally, opening up the large garage attached by a button on the visor before pulling inside. Cas's car was in here too, off to the side, a box of tools beside it. Cas himself barely noticed though, he cared too much that the car had shut off and Dean was already climbing out to get Cas's bags. Cas clambered out after him, trying to keep his excitement to himself, and doing a pretty poor job of it if Dean's small chuckle was anything to go by. "Do you really think you'll be needing these tonight? Or can we grab them out tomorrow?" Dean asked and Cas hurriedly replied with, "Tomorrow is okay." 

Dean grinned, knowing all too well how eager Cas was which made Dean a peculiar and not too typical kind of nervous. He was used to eager and excited people wanting to get him into bed, but this was different. Cas said he wasn't a virgin but his ass had to have been from what Dean had experienced just last night. That made Dean a first of sorts to Cas. And Cas was someone he really did want to impress which made all of this so much more important. A drunken Cas liked how Dean had done him over, but how would this sober Castiel fare?

He opened up the door for both of them and Cas happily walked back inside, knowing the expanse of Dean's small home, or basically knowing the layout. The door he had just entered he hadn't noticed the previous time but it led off of the hallway that also led to the reception area. Cas turned to the left and headed into Dean's actual living area. When Dean came in and tossed his keys onto the kitchen counter Cas practically jumped him. He wasn't exactly sure how to initiate sex but for him, he was definitely ready. He was horny and wanted Dean to just take him to bed. 

Dean was in complete control in a matter of seconds, not minding the hot sloppy kiss pressed against his lips. His tongue slipped into Cas's mouth, an arm wrapping around his waist, pulling them together so they were chest to chest, hip to hip. He was making Cas whimper into him with every teasing rut of his hips against the smaller man's. "This time," Dean whispered in between kissing and panting, his breath crawling over Cas's heated and sensitive skin, "I'm going to take care of you properly. I won't leave one inch untouched." 

A shiver ran down Cas's spine and he nodded, head turning and mouth searching for Dean's again, catching his jaw again and sucking a spot into it much like Dean had done to his collar bone last night. There was still a mark there in fact, dark and it turned Cas on to a confusing level. How such a small mark could make him feel so flustered he didn't understand. But he placed one right under Dean's jaw before the man turned his head to catch Cas's kiss swollen lips with his own.

"Bedroom," Dean ordered in this deep, gruff sex voice that made Cas's cock twitch in the confines of his pants. He barely even pulled away from Dean as they made their way to Dean's bedroom, stopping every once in a while so Dean could press Cas against the wall and continuing their make out session. When they did get to the bedroom Dean pushed him down onto the bed, immediately freeing Cas of his shirt.

Cas whimpered and looked up at Dean with his lust blown, wide eyes. It wasn't long before Dean had Cas completely naked in front of them though he had failed to remove a single article of his own clothing. "What are you doing? Please Dean..." Cas arched up off the back trying to press closer to the man and tempt him to strip down. 

"Not yet, I have to get you ready first." 

"I am ready. Really, I'm ready. Please."

"I don't think so. Trust me Cas, let me show you what you've been missing out on," Dean leaned down, sucking one of Cas's nipples into his mouth again subjecting him to the wonderful torture. Cas moaned, wrapping one arm around Dean, the other hand curling into the sheets as he held on for the wild ride and a night of rough sex and tangled limbs and tongues with Dean.


	15. Breakfast

Cas didn't fall asleep right away after their wild sex. Dean was curled around him, being the big spoon and Cas was still catching his breath. He was fairly sure Dean was still awake as well though his breathing had evened out to a nice comforting pace. The sex had definitely been better than last time despite distinctly remembering that feeling of pleasure as well. It had to be about a half an hour since Dean had pulled out of Cas, leaving hot cum running down between his ass cheeks. Yet Cas could still feel Dean's hands on him, and his mouth. This had to have been the best night of his entire life. 

Dean hadn't given him any mercy, pounding into Cas relentlessly until he was quite literally screaming in pleasure. Dean knew how to use what God gave him and it left Cas feeling like a puddle at the end of it. Not to mention he had this wide grin on his face he couldn't seem to remove even now. 

It was hot under the covers and Cas kicked one leg out from them, pulling them over the sheets and sighing at the relief the cool air brought. But it wasn't enough to get him ready to sleep. He chewed on his bottom lip, still swollen and tender from so much kissing. His throat burned slightly too. He had decided he wanted to try taking Dean today but he couldn't get him in that far. He had been rather embarrassed but Dean didn't seem to mind at all, reacting to every lick and careful squeeze his hand made with a the most spine tingling, pornographic moan he'd ever heard. 

_I wonder what Dean looks like when he sleeps._ The thought popped into Cas's mind and he released his lip from his teeth before deciding to find out and he carefully shifted as to not disturb the sleeping man behind him. When he settled again he was almost nose to nose with Dean. Dean's arm was still wrapped tightly around him, his eyes were closed, dark lashes framing them and laugh lines in the corners, only if he looked though. His eyes fluttered a little every now and then and Cas wondered what he was dreaming about. If he was dreaming. Dean's lips were thick and full, still swollen just like Cas's and a little dried out too from all the kissing. Without thinking, Cas leaned in and pressed his lips softly against the man's. He was lucky Dean didn't stir even when he pulled back. 

He noticed something new as he looked at him this close up, focusing on his face. Dean had a splattering of freckles across his nose and cheeks. But he was so tan they blended in most of the time. They were there though. Sun kisses. That's what Gabriel told him once when he was still really little and Cas had asked him why he had spots on his face. Cas had always liked that name for them. He'd heard once somewhere that they were also called angel kisses. Either one worked well. 

Some people counted sheep to fall asleep, but Cas took to counting Dean's freckles. He got mixed up a couple times and had to start over, and he'd finally fallen asleep right before he finished. It didn't matter though, Cas told himself, because he'd just finish counting tomorrow night. 

He got the best sleep he had in years that night. Even recently when he'd slept in long or more than he was used to, it wasn't the perfect kind of deep sleep. But this night was. Cass had ended up tucking his head under Dean's chin, brave enough to do so when Dean was still sleeping. He smelled like Dean there. Of course he smelled like himself everywhere, but that spot under his chin, just at his neck, was where the scent was strongest. He had only this intoxicating smell and Dean's strong arms around him to blame for the feeling of comfort and safety that led to such a good sleep.

He didn't notice the next morning when Dean slipped out of bed, kissing the top of his head first. He simply curled up around Dean's pillow and pulled the covers up tight under his chin. What _did_ wake him up however was the smell of food. Good food too. He blinked his eyes open and yawned, confused when he didn't see Dean. But then the smell of food registered again and he sat up, rubbing his eyes and running a hand through what he could still rightly call his sex hair. There was whistling coming from out the door and Cas smiled again because that was pretty cute. 

Cas got up, shivering at the air, and pulled on his boxers and a discarded shirt which he found to be Dean's once he got it on. He hoped Dean didn't mind. All his bags were still in the impala which included changes of clothes and pajamas. He got his answer though as Dean appeared in the doorway and grinned over at him. "You know," he began, "I always liked it when women wore my shirts after sex. But let me tell you, you got them all topped," he chuckled and Cas felt his face redden. 

"I didn't have anything else on hand... uh... thank you," Cas averted his eyes to the ground for just a moment before returning them to meet Dean's gaze. 

"C'mere," Dean gestured for Cas to step closer and he did, unsure of what Dean intended. He was pleasantly surprised when Dean leaned down, kissing him softly and wrapping his arms around him. He could get used to waking up to that every morning. "I made breakfast," he said once he'd pulled back. "Are you hungry?" 

"Yes, very, thank you," Cas smiled and Dean chuckled. 

"Well come on then, don't want it to get cold," Dean pulled him out towards the kitchen, his arm wrapped around Cas's waist. The closer they got to the kitchen the better it smelled. "Tada! My famous after sex pancakes," Dean grinned when they got into the kitchen.

"Famous?"

"I've slept with a lot of people," Dean shrugged as he reminded Cas though it didn't look like he was quite proud of the reminder. He then added, "But I went all out for you. I made bacon too, and eggs, and fruit. Is it okay?" he asked, looking at Cas for approval. 

"It smells delicious Dean. Thank you," Cas nodded. "And, I don't mind that you've slept with other people and made them pancakes Dean..." he added, trying to let him know that he wasn't jealous or upset that he'd had relations with others before him. They were over anyways, gone.

"That's good. But I still want you to know that you're special," Dean moved out from behind Cas to go grab them plates. He handed Cas his and gestured for him to get food first. "This is for you, I'll take what you leave," he smiled and Cas felt another small blush spread across his cheeks. 

"This was very sweet of you Dean," he commented softly and Dean chuckled. 

"Not as sweet as the pancakes. Now stop complimenting me and get your food before it gets cold," Dean leaned down and kissed him on his cheek.

Cas did get his food. It all smelled so good. Once he had his plate piled high Dean directed him to sit at the table. The table was pressed up near the window and Cas slid into the chair, looking out into Dean's backyard. It was surprisingly big and well kept. He obviously did all his own yard work and it was a lot nicer than what Cas got to see in the city. "Is it hard to keep up?" he asked to no one in particular as Dean sat down across from him. 

"Not really, just a bit of trimming," Dean shook his head. 

They both fell silent for a little while as they cut up their pancakes and started eating. Cas was very pleasantly surprised at the taste of them. They smelled as good as they looked, if not more so. It was amazing. He rubbed them in syrup and took another bite, swallowing before saying, "I didn't see you as a person who enjoyed cooking. More someone who prefers eating out or microwave dinners and beer." 

"Well you're not wrong. But you aren't right either. I do prefer to eat out, but I know how to cook and I enjoy doing it for special people," he pointed his fork at Cas as if an example. 

"You mean people you sleep with?"

"Not necessarily. Sometimes. Sometimes though it's people that I really like," he shrugged. "And I learned how to cook because when we were little Dad was always busy in the shop so I had to take care of Sam and I." 

"Well you learned well," Cas complimented with a smile. "I really do like these pancakes. They are honestly the best I've ever had the pleasure of tasting." 

"Then you don't eat a lot of pancakes do you?" Dean laughed, his eyes crinkling at the corners. 

"No, I don't." Cas laughed too and looked back down at them. "But I've had enough..." he added and he felt a pleasant warmth fill his chest when he saw Dean's smile. 

"So, what do you want to do today Cas?" Dean asked, beaming over at him. 

"I-I don't know..." Cas blinked at him. He hadn't planned on Dean asking him that. "What's there to do?" he looked over at him. 

"We have lots of stuff. And there's big town within a half an hour from here. I can take a day off and drive us out there if you want," he sucked his bottom lip into his mouth as he waited for Cas's verdict. 

"Well... how about you surprise me?" Cas asked, still unsure as to what he should say. 

"I can do that. Today it's just you and me okay?"

"Okay," Cas smiled down at his pancakes because that sounded really good. Him and Dean all day, no interruptions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check out an article published on fanfiction, also written by me! https://geeks.media/the-magic-of-fan-fiction?_ga=2.111970820.142276998.1506912793-416789174.1506912793


	16. City Break

Dean went out to get Cas's bags after breakfast and Cas took a shower and got dressed. When he got out Dean was all dressed himself in a pair of jeans and another plaid shirt. He was sitting in the living room and watching the news. He looked up when Cas walked out and a smile spread over his face. "You ready?" he asked, turning off the television and standing up. 

"I believe so," Cas tugged at the hem of his suit jacket. He wished he'd had something else to wear but the suits were all he had. 

"Then let's go," Dean grinned and picked up his keys from the counter, heading out towards the garage. Cas followed behind him through the tight hallway. He didn't expect it when Dean reached back and took his hand. But he wasn't about to complain.

Dean took him into his car and before Cas knew it they were driving out of the small town. Cas watched the trees passing by the car window and leaned his head against the cool glass as Dean slid their fingers together. "What do you think? Bowling? Have you ever been bowling before?" Dean asked him. 

"Of course I have been bowling. I'm just not very good at it," Cas sighed because he really didn't want to make a complete fool out of himself which is surely what he'd end up doing if they went. 

"I'm sure you're not that bad," Dean assured him.

"You don't know what you're getting yourself into."

"Well how about I teach you then. I can do that," Dean smiled over at him but Cas's frown only deepened. 

"Won't that be a little cliche'?" Cas asked him. 

"Well, yeah. That was the point. Too cheesy? I thought it would be cute. Sorry. We can do something else," Dean reached up to rub the back of his neck, taking his hand from Cas's and then Cas felt bad. 

"We can bowl if you want to. I didn't mean it was a bad thing. I'm just not very good. I don't want you to laugh," Cas said. 

"Cas, I would never laugh at you," Dean assured him. "Let's go bowl okay? It will be fun, I promise. And if you really do suck and even I can't teach you then I'll let you beat me at air hockey okay? And I'll buy the food. Deal?" he looked over at Cas and Cas gave a small smile and nod. "Good. I promise I'll make sure we have fun. You can pick something to do afterwards."

Cas couldn't help but agree that it did sound kind of nice actually. He smiled as he laid his head back down against the window and Dean took his hand again. He enjoyed watching the trees pass which eventually turned into buildings. Another city.


	17. Bowling Balls Can't Break

Cas was ready when they pulled up outside of the bowling alley. Dean parked the impala and Cas climbed out. It didn't look like much from the outside and Dean must have noticed Cas's disappointment. "It's better on the inside I promise," he chewed on his bottom lip as he watched Cas. 

"I don't doubt you. Let's go in then," Cas offered and Dean nodded. "Honestly Dean. The appearance of the place is not of great importance to me. I'm sure I will be happy with whatever it looks like, you don't have to worry," he said when Dean didn't release his bottom lip from his mouth. 

"I know, I just really want this to be perfect. It's kind of like our first date you know?" Dean said and shrugged, looking over at him. "I'm normally not so cheesy I promise. It's just different for me to really want to impress someone." 

"I've already slept with you Dean. Twice. It is not a far cry to say that I have already been quite impressed."

"Yeah well a lot of people have slept with me Cas. This isn't the same. It's one thing to look at me and want me to fuck your brains out. But this is a relationship. I don't do many of those," he shrugged again. 

"You are doing fine Dean. Believe me. You have impressed me with your care for me over and over again. Though I will admit you are very attractive Dean Winchester," Cas gave him a small smile but he was mostly serious. Dean chuckled and shook his head as they walked into the bowling alley. He was right. It did look better from the inside. The outside was nothing more than a brick building but the inside was filled with lanes, the smell of bowling balls and pizza, and arcade games with flashing neon lights. It wasn't anything spectacular but it was nice and actually looked pretty new. Cas smiled and felt Dean watching him, probably making sure he didn't mess up their first date.

"I believe this is the point where we are supposed to pay for a lane and those shoes," Cas looked at him and Dean nodded. 

"Right, sorry," Dean gave a shy smile and walked up to the counter, waiting for someone to come over to help them. 

"Perhaps for lunch we could get something from the bar here," Cas nodded to the bar on the other side of the bowling alley. 

"Whatever you want Cas. You're calling the shots. I'm just paying and making suggestions." 

After a bit an employee came up and Dean paid for two games of bowling and their rental shoes. Cas took his shoes and they went to find their lane. Then he sat down on the couch, taking off the sensible black shoes he always wore and changing them out for a pair of leather red and blue ones with slippery soles and laces. It had been a long time since Cas had ever worn a shoe with laces and it came out lopsided but was tied nonetheless. 

"Do you want to go first or should I?" Dean asked, having already finished his shoe swap and standing at the control for the board where he was going to put their names. 

"You should go first," Cas urged him, not in any hurry to embarrass himself in front of Dean. He watched as Dean then entered both of their names, his in the first slot and Cas's in the slot below that. Then he pressed start and the board set itself. He picked up a bowling ball from the rack and tested it before deciding it would do and going up to roll the ball down the lane. He knocked eight down, a split. Cas watched with interest as Dean waited for the ball to come back and then he took another shot, only hitting one. 

"You're turn," Dean smiled as he went to take a spot on the couch. Cas stood up, a little uneasy, and went to go pick up a bowling ball of his own. It took a few tries to find one he was comfortable with but then he took a deep breath and rolled it down the lane, only for it to curve to one edge and fall into the gutter before it hit any pins. Cas felt his face go red and hoped he could redeem himself on the next roll. It went a little better and he knocked down three pins, but that didn't seem very good to Cas and his face was still red when he sat down.

"I told you I'm not very good..." he mumbled. 

"You did fine," Dean assured him and leaned over to kiss one of Cas's red cheeks. "You're just warming up," he then added. But three turns later and Cas wasn't doing much better. His fourth time up Dean went up with him. "You need to swing your arm forward," he now instructed. "You keep swinging out. Try this..." Dean went behind Cas and wrapped one arm around Cas, his other moving down to Cas's arm. 

"Isn't this a little cliche Winchester?" Cas asked though he couldn't mind it even if he tried. 

"I've kind of been hoping to do this since we got here," Dean then admitted with a chuckle and Dean's breath brushed warmly over the back of Cas's neck. A pleasant shiver went down Cas's spine and then Dean pulled Cas's arm back and swung forward. Cas released the ball and it rolled straight towards the pins, knocking most of them over. "Now you try," Dean smiled and kissed Cas's cheek. "For good luck." 

Cas looked back at Dean and tried to remember how it felt, the position Dean had moved his arm in. But he mostly just remembered the breath and the feeling of Dean's sturdy body pressed up against Cas's back. He rolled the ball, knocking over the last few pins. "Did I just?" he looked at the empty space at the back of the lane. 

"You just got a spare. Good job," Dean smiled over at him. 

After they finished the first game, Cas still inevitably losing but not by as much as Cas had feared, they went to the restaurant to order some food and take it back to their lane to eat. Dean ordered a burger and Cas ordered a hot dog. He hadn't had a hot dog since he was a kid and he wondered if they were as good as he remembered. He sat down, looking down at the hot dog. Ketchup and Mustard only, just how he'd liked it so long ago. Dean was already eating so Cas lifted the hot dog to his mouth and took a bite, letting out a satisfied moan. "Mmm.. i's good," he mumbled, mouth full. 

Dean grinned, feeling like this date really was going well. Especially seeing how happy Cas was now and how comfortable. "You can have some of my fries too if you want," he offered Cas because he wasn't going to finish the whole burger and a basket of crispy french fries. Well he probably could, he just wasn't going to. He'd rather share with Cas.

Cas looked over at him after swallowing his bite of hot dog and smiled, happily taking a fry and popping it in his mouth, leaning his head against Dean's shoulder and closing his eyes in satisfaction. "Best date ever..." he whispered and Dean couldn't help but beam.


	18. Breakin the Streak

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry it took me so long to update. I've received multiple comments and I finally got some free time and inspiration so here you go! If it gets to be too long before I update again, just keep throwing the comments at me and I'll get around to it. College life is busy! Hope you enjoy!

One more round of bowling, Dean winning again, and they were up to put the bowling balls back on the rack and give their shoes back to the man behind the counter. Cas was glad to have his own shoes back on, as the rented ones had begun to give him blisters, however he had really started to have fun and wished it would have lasted longer as he looked towards the glass sliding doors that were the only source of light from the outside. 

"Are you ready?" Dean asked. He'd been talking before, however Cas had zoned out, staring out the doors to the parking lot and watching the sun settling onto the black pavement. 

"Ready for what?" Cas glanced up at him and he watched Dean's smile shift his mouth up at one corner. 

"Arcade. Games?" Dean finally said, holding up a few dollars. "Come on, you know you want to. Besides, I promised to let you win at air hockey didn't I? I need to keep my promises, Cas." 

"Right," Cas smiled. He glanced over at all the arcade games with flashing neon lights and music that all blended together. "I'm ready. But, just so you know, no one ever said you had to let me win. That wouldn't be fair, Dean."

"Really, I want you to be able to win. I don't mind."

"No, you see, it wouldn't be fair when I know I'm going to win either way," Cas said, his face seemingly completely ambivalent at the time. "My brother liked to play that game when we were younger. I'm rather good if I do say so myself," he finally let the smile creep onto his face.

"Alright, well if that's the case," Dean walked over and started putting bills into the token machine, "you're on."

Soon Dean had Cas under the glow of the air hockey game. He put the four tokens in and the game buzzed as it came to life, air causing the puck to rise ever so slightly from the surface of the game and seemingly hover. It had fallen into the slot on Cas's side and he held onto it, leaning over as he held onto the paddle, glancing up at Dean. Dean was watching him from the other side, eyes hovering over his face just as the puck seemed to do, traveling from his lips up to his eyes. His tongue was sticking out slightly from the pink in his lips and it made Cas lick his own. "Dean, I would like to make a bet," he said, a thought coming to him. 

"Oh yeah, Cas? What would that be?" 

"Loser has to give the winner a kiss," Cas said, craving the taste of Dean. Dean had been peppering his cheeks with kisses all day but his lips tingled with the anticipation of having Dean's pressed against them again. 

"Who's being cliche now, Cas?" Dean chuckled deeply and Cas nearly hummed from the way the sound resonated through his body. "I'll take that bet." Cas grinned at that and his face turned serious as his focus settled on the game. His hand left the puck and his paddle sent it speeding across the game towards Dean's goal. Dean hit it back and then Cas returned it again. It continued like that for a good thirty seconds until Cas made the first point. Five minutes later, Cas also made the last one of the game and he stood up straighter, looking over at Dean expectantly. "You weren't lying when you said you were good," Dean stepped away from the game into the aisle and smiled at him. 

"No, I was not. But I do believe that there was a bet to uphold," Cas shifted closer to him. Dean didn't waste any time after that before closing the space between them, cupping Cas's face in one hand, his other sliding under Cas's trenchcoat and around his waist as their lips met. Cas pressed up into the kiss, feeling like he'd been deprived of water for too long and Dean was the only one who could quench his thirst. Dean was the one to pull back first and Cas unconsciously leaned after him but only for a second before he opened his eyes and looked up. Dean was still incredibly close, breath brushing against Cas's cheek. If he moved just ever so slightly they'd be kissing again and Cas had to consciously stop himself from doing just that. 

"How was that?" Dean asked him, tilting Cas's head up then with a finger so that their gazes would meet. 

"Better than any gold medal or accolade that I've received in any of my academics. That's for sure..." Cas said and that made Dean laugh softly, hot breath warming Cas's cheek. 

"You know, that's the first time I've lost a game of air hockey in so long... I don't even remember the last time. You broke my streak," Dean accused in a teasing manner. 

"I apologize. I suppose I could award you a consolation prize."

"And what would that be?" Dean cocked an eyebrow. Cas smiled to himself and adjusted ever so slightly to initiate yet another kiss, and Dean had to admit, it was a pretty damn good prize.


	19. Break the Camera

Cas had expected after the game was over that Dean would be taking them back home. However, Dean refused, taking the remaining tokens and putting them into different games like Skee ball and the claw machine which took Dean six tries before he won something for Cas, despite Cas insisting that Dean didn't have to waste his money to get him a stuffed animal. When Dean finally landed the bumble bee plush into the hole his whole face lit up and he raised his arms in the air and cheered. Cas, who had been laying against the glass stood upright once more and grinned at Dean. Dean bent down to pull the bee out and then he held it out proudly to Cas. Cas took it and looked it over with a smile. 

"I do like bumble bees, Dean. They are my favorite," Cas smiled and ran his fingers over the fuzzy body and soft, silky wings. "Thank you." 

"I didn't know they were your favorite. That was just lucky I guess," Dean wrapped an arm around Cas's waist, pulling him into him. "You're more than welcome," he kissed Cas's cheek. "Now come on. There's one more thing to do before we go!" 

"And what would that be?" Cas asked as Dean took him by his elbow and guided him through the maze of games with beeping sounds and flashing multicolored lights. Dean didn't say anything in response. Instead he pulled Cas to a little photo booth that was sitting alone in the corner of the arcade and he pushed him inside first against the wall before getting in beside him. 

"I don't know about this..." Cas frowned, looking at the camera. He was never one to like having his picture taken. He felt awkward, too stiff in all of the photos, too professional. He didn't want Dean to waste his money on something that he didn't feel would turn out well. 

"Well I do. I want pictures with you, Cas," Dean grinned and shoved a crumpled five dollar bill in the entrance of the money slot. Surprisingly, the machine took it on the first try, and Dean leaned up to pick the frame that they wanted. 

"I don't even know what to do for these..." 

"Don't worry about that. Just follow my lead," Dean assured him and soon Dean had them pressed together in the machine, one arm around his waist as the first picture was counting down. "Just a normal picture. Smile okay?" Cas smiled. But he knew he still looked stiff. Dean seemed to notice this as well. He looked down at Cas when the next countdown started. Cas began to apologize, blushing with embarrassment, hoping Dean hadn't thought he'd ruined the photo. However Dean didn't seem upset. And he cut him off quickly, cupping Cas's face and pressing their lips together once more. It was an effective way of getting Cas to shut up, and apparently of getting him to relax. The third picture was Dean just looking down at Cas after the kiss, Cas's eyes still closed and leaning into Dean's touch. Cas looked up between that one and the final one and Dean picked up the bumble bee that was sitting between them and booped Cas's nose with it. Which made Cas laugh. Right as the camera went off. 

They climbed out after that and waited for the pictures to print. Two copies fell into the plastic bin and Dean picked them both up, handing one to Cas and keeping the other to himself. Cas had to admit they turned out good. And he felt a twinge inside him as he thought to himself that these would be good to remember Dean by... once he had to leave.

"You're so adorable, I'm surprised you didn't break the camera with your cuteness," Dean smiled over at him. That lopsided smile that made Cas's stomach tilt to the angle of Dean's lips. 

"Shut up," Cas blushed and reached out to smack Dean with the bee. 

"Come on. The rest of our day awaits," Dean smiled down at him then and wove his fingers between Cas's as he pulled him out, still holding the pictures gently in his other hand.


	20. Take a Break

Cas wasn’t sure what else Dean had planned but for once he was happy to follow someone else’s lead. Dean seemed confident in his own itinerary and he had yet to let Cas down. No matter how many questions Cas asked him, Dean remained mysterious, just giving him a knowing grin.

“Just trust me,” Dean said after about the tenth question Cas peppered him with. They had been driving for a little while at this point and Cas was watching the town pass by through the windows. 

“I have an enormous amount of trust placed in you, Dean. I’m simply curious,” Cas replied, tugging his tie a bit to loosen it. It was yet another day of business suits as he had yet to purchase any casual wear and he argued that Dean’s shirts didn’t match well with black dress pants. 

“Curiosity killed the cat...” 

“Then it is fortuitous that I am not a cat, is it not?” 

Dean’s smirk once again tugged up the corner of his mouth and he let out a soft hum. “I’m still not telling you where we’re going. You’ll just have to wait and see.” 

It wasn’t long before the close knit city neighborhoods gave way to suburban neighborhoods and plentiful trees falling in between. This only made Cas even more inquisitive as to their destination. There had been numerous things to do in the city, as it was with most cities. However an area like this didn’t seem to have much more than a shopping mall and a movie theater. 

Then something caught his eye, peeking over the roofs and treetops, a glint of light. Cas squinted as he eyed it but it soon disappeared once more behind foliage. Once more, a few moments later it returned and Cas was quick to realize that it was glass. A white paned glass ceiling came into view, windows shaped to points. 

“What is that, Dean? Is that where we are going?” Cas pointed out the windshield so Dean could see too. 

Dean didn’t answer verbally, but there was a smile on his face as he slowed at a stop sign to make a turn. The second the car shifted onto the new road, Cas could see the entire building. Every inch was made of glass, reflecting light to the buildings around it and sending it fluttering through Car windows. 

“It’s beautiful, Dean!” Cas’s eyes were blown wide. He couldn’t see inside but the building itself was a sight to behold. 

There was a nearly empty lot next to the building and Dean pulled in, finding a spot and turning off the car. He looked over at Cas who was staring out the windshield in awe. “Are you coming, or are you happy to just look at it from the car?” he teased. 

Cas tore his gaze away from the spectacle and looked at Dean, blinking a couple of times as he mentally replayed the question Dean had just asked him. Once he caught on he unbuckled his seat belt and stepped out of the car. Dean followed suit, locking it up before going around to meet Cas on his side. 

“Just up this way,” Dean pointed to the sidewalk and he grabbed Cas’s hand in his, intertwining their fingers, then tugging him up to the door. Cas had to crane his neck up to look at the top of the building at the reflected light nearly blinded him. It had nothing on the size of buildings in his own city, but the shape of it, and finding it in the middle of the suburbs, had caught Cas’s fascination. He didn’t even notice Dean opening the door for him until the other whispered, “After you,” directly into his ear. 

Blue eyes fell down to where Dean had pushed open the door and he sucked in his breath, slowly, as he was greeted by colorful flowers, trees climbing to scrape the glass ceilings, cobble stoned paths leading into the forest inside glass. “It’s a greenhouse?” Cas phrased it as a question, though the answer was obvious. He stepped inside, Dean following him and letting the door fall shut behind them. 

“Botanical Gardens, but yes. The community works hard on it.” 

“I can tell. It’s exquisite,” Cas continued deeper into the gardens, stopping to look at some three petaled flowers with yellow bursting from the center of scarlets and oranges. “Oh look!” He leaned over one of the flowers, staring at a fluffy black and yellow striped ball with wings. “Bees!” 

“Bees? Where?” Dean asked wearily as he tried to see where Cas was looking. 

“On this flower. They’re very cute, don’t you think?” Cas tilted his head to the side, as the bee flew away and he straightened himself up. 

“I don’t know about cute...” 

“Of course they’re cute. They’re fuzzy, and did you know that their wings are actually too small for their bodies? They shouldn’t physically be able to fly, and yet they can.” 

“You sure know a lot about bees,” Dean smiled over at him, because even if he wasn’t a fan of any bug, the way Cas was so intrigued by them made him happy. “They’re an important part of our environment. And they won’t hurt you unless they feel threatened. It’s quite literally a last resort. They’d give their lives to protect their family...” Cas nodded as if he were proving a point. 

“Then maybe I should start calling you my little bumblebee,” Dean wiggled his eyebrows and Cas felt his face redden a bit. 

“I do not understand what commonplace I would have to a bee.” 

“Well you’re cute. And I’m assuming you won’t hurt someone unless you feel threatened,” a laugh from Dean only made Cas’s face heat up more. 

“I think I can agree with at least one of those two things,” Cas gave him a smile. 

Dean chuckled, a sound that made Cas’s heart sing and Cas stepped closer to Dean’s side. He was more than agreeable when Dean took that as a sign to wrap his arm around Cas’s waist and he closed his eyes momentarily, leaning his head against the taller man’s shoulder. 

“So why did you pick this place for us to go?” Cas broke the silence a bit of walking later. 

“It’s pretty, usually quiet, it’s relaxing. I figure you can always use some of that,” Dean replied. “I’m guessing you don’t get the time to just stop and smell the flowers, figuratively and literally. You need a break from the busy rush hour life of the city. And living near a big university you probably don’t see many gardens like this anyways.” 

“Well you assumed correctly, on all counts,” Cas nodded and pulled Dean to a stop to look at a beautiful fountain in the middle of the atrium. “I’m very glad you brought me here today.” 

“And I’m very glad that you’re very glad,” Dean kissed the top of Cas’s head and Cas’s smile doubled in size. “Now come on, there’s a lot more to see.”


End file.
